Who's the fastest reader?
Me, 'cause I'll be jumping off so many stories.
Height Jokes
Other girls be like, "I want a 6ft guy", meanwhile I want to be 6ft under. 😃👍
Why do midgets laugh when they run?
Because the grass tickles their balls.
Why do dwarfs laugh when they run?
The grass tickles their balls.
A pilot is having a talk with one of his passengers. The passenger asks, "Why did you become a pilot?" The pilot replies with, "To face my fears." The passenger then says, "You're afraid of heights?" "No, I'm afraid of dying alone."
If you drop an emo and a piece of paper from a tree, which will hit the ground first?
The piece of paper because the rope will stop the emo.
I don't always like to tell dwarf jokes. But when I do, I like to keep them short.
When midgets smoke weed, do they get high or do they get medium?
When dwarfs get high, do they just get medium?
What can a dwarf do standing up that a tall person can't do standing up?
Suck dick.
Why do lawyers use Viagra? To grow taller.
Did you hear about the 100 centimeter girl?
I’d really like to meter.
What do you call someone who wants to commit suicide by jumping off a building?
A cliffhanger.
When a midget smokes weed, do they get high or medium?
Dad: "If they jumped off a bridge, would you?"
Tommy: "Yes, cuz there would be a body pile to break my fall!"
Why can't dwarfs be depressed?
Because they are compressed.
I asked my midget neighbor if he wanted a lift. He told me to "Fuck off!!!" I thought, what a cheeky cunt and zipped my backpack up and walked away.
If I place a slide on the edge of a cliff or a really high building, would going down it be considered "suislide"?
Asking for a friend.
I hate child murderers, they're always so high-pitched.
I know a good airplane joke, but it would probably go over your heads.
The twin towers: No, it won't.