Intercourse

Intercourse Jokes

Anilingus

What is the difference between a man performing anilingus on a woman and a man performing cunnilingus on a woman?

If a man is performing anilingus on a woman, it is not classified as heterosexual sodomy, you fucking idiot!!!!!

Boy

As a little boy, I walked in on my parents having intercourse one night, and of course, my parents stopped and sent me back to bed.

The next day my dad tells me, "Don't worry son, I wasn't hurting mommy, we were just trying to make you a little sister."

So, when I was young I always wanted a pet. I then looked at my father and asked, "Could you do mommy doggy style next time? I want a puppy."

Necrophilia

One night, I saw a woman sitting behind a dumpster. So I took her home. We talked all the way there. When we got home, I gave her a bath. Later on, things started getting passionate. We started doing intercourse, and some of the noises she made you would have thought she was still alive!

Penis

Doctor: "Does your penis burn after intercourse?"

Patient: "I don't know. I never tried lighting it."

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  • Girl

    A girl and boy are in bed after sex. The boy goes, “I can’t believe they got together after all that shit.” The girl says, “Who?” The boy goes, “My ass cheeks.”

    Name

    How can you make a woman scream your name when you have sex with her?

    Change your name to "Rape."

    Oreo

    What do you call a white man having intercourse with a black woman?

    An Oreo.

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  • Squirt

    What is the worst part about making an Asian girl squirt?

    She charges you for extra sauce!

    Sex

    What does a Chinese man say to his partner when having sex?

    "Ching Chong Soc Mai Ding Dong"

    Pilot

    The pilot that hit the Pentagon must suck at sex because he missed the hole.

    Yo mama

    I fiddled your mum last night, she fucking moaned like a fucking wilder beast.

    Dick

    Question: Do you know who Candis is?

    Answer: Can dis dick fit in your mouth?

    Nun

    Person: "How many people have you had intercourse with?"

    Me: "Nun."

    Song

    What song is sung when conceiving?

    "Let's Get Physical, Physical!"