Poop jokes
So, a bear and a rabbit are in a field. The bear turns to the rabbit and asks, "Does your poop stick to your fur?" The rabbit replied, "No." Then the bear picks up the rabbit and wipes his butt.
I tried to explain to my 4 year old son that it's perfectly normal to accidentally poop your pants. But he's still making fun of me.
What did the squirrel say to the dog?
"There are nuts in your poop. I found them!"
What do you call a planet that poops? Uranus.
you.
Me: John, what did he do earlier?
John: Hold on, I’m trying to think.
Me: I thought I smelled poop.
I'd tell ya a poop joke, but you're my favorite turd.
Your mom sings "It's the Final Countdown" while pooping.
So, I took a poop outside. When I was done, I wiped and got it on my finger. After that, I had Nutella, and I thought the poop on my hand was Nutella, and I licked it. I said, "Daddy chill, what in the heck is this crap?!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
Wanna hear a poop joke?
Nah, they always stink.
I say "cow poop," cows say "moonure."
Your face was so ugly, you got adopted by a poop!
What did one poop say to the other poop? What's the matter? You look flushed!
What did the poop say to the toilet paper? “You’re on a roll!”
Why does a chicken cross the road?
To poop and pee in the potty!
I was on the Oregon trail with my friend's brother, Carl. He got cholera, so we threw him off the wagon. When we came back, he was having a seizure and pooping uncontrollably. It was pretty cholerious.
Rabbit poop is cereal.
- Got myself a bathroom scale so now I know exactly how much I poop.
- Right. So you weigh yourself before and after you poop and calculate the difference? That’s cool.
- Oh...that might actually be even easier.
What do Cavemen poop in?
A Neander stall.
Q: What do you call a pigeon that is full of poop that flies in front of a car?
A: A suicide bomber.