God: i feel like i'm forgetting something....... oh no Earth *sees it on fire* oh it's fine People of Earth: *running and screaming* Santen: *to God* realy
I pushed my best friend's chair in class, now i kinda feel bad that he was in a wheelchair.
How does Skeletor feel after He-Man beats him up? Skelesore.
How did the chicken 🐔 feel after escaping the fry cook?
Clucky!
are u feeling down cos i wanna feel u up
In this modern age, I feel as though it's inappropriate to make jokes about herbs and fish. It's not the thyme or the plaice for it.
Why did a orphan say I'm wanted? because they wanted to feel a lie in their life.
You know, you should adopt a pet. So then you can feel the pain that your parents felt when they adopted you... wait... also the regret after.
Why did Daveon go to the doctor? Because he was feeling 'daveon' in the dumps.
Why do orphans say go big or go home So that way they feel important
I feel bad for the kids at Sandy Hook all they wanted was books but got magazines instead
This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
So I bus crashes killing everyone on the bus and god feels so bad that he gives each one a wish so the first person comes up and she wants to be beautiful so god makes her beautiful and she goes into heaven next person comes up and he says I want to be beautiful as well as the last man in the back begins laughing a little so this goes on everyone becoming beautiful until god asked the last person what they want and he said I want everyone in front of me to be ugly again! so god had to call the based department and gave him everything that last guy wanted
This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
i must have raped a woman in a skip. She said she felt rubbish.
This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
So Jesus has been nailed to the cross. On the first day, he starts to moan, "Peter, Peter".
Well, Peter hears Jesus moaning and feels it is important, so begins to go up the hill. On his way, he is met by some Roman soldiers and they proceed to beat his ass back down the hill.
On the second day, Peter hears Jesus moaning again, "Peter, Peter".
Peter thinks to himself, this is important. He heads up the hill, fights past the first line, but gets a beatdown by the second group and back down the hill he goes.
On the third day, Peter is woken up by Jesus sounding very weak, but calling out, "Peter, Peter".
Peter feels that whatever it is that Jesus needs him for, must be very important. Peter heads up the hill, he is on a mission. He manages to fight his way thru three sets of Roman guards and make his way to the cross Jesus has been nailed to for three days. He looks up to Jesus, and says "Jesus, I have heard your calls, what is so important"?
Jesus- "Peter, I can see your house from here".
I always feel better when my doctor says something is normal for my age but then think dying will also be normal for my age at some point.
if I was to not eat the last biscuit, I would feel "crummy"
Patient: doctor every time I look in a mirror, I feel ill, as if I'm about to throw up what's wrong with me? Doctor: I don't know but your eyesight is perfect.
