Animal jokes
What happened to the chicken when he crossed the road? He didn't. He got run over by a truck.
Why do cheetahs run? Because they are spotty.
What do you call a cold Explain bear?
A brrr.
What do you call a lazy kangaroo?
A pouch potato.
If a dog is white with black spots, then it is 90% great and 10% guilty because it half way starts crimes and is a mistake to the world and is punished by the white dogs that are full white and not mixed colors.
This is how animals were named.
"Bye Son." *cuts call*. What are we talking about?
"Bison. Perfect."
What do you call a rapper who LOVES to fish?
MC Hammerhead.
What's a rapper's favorite kind of pet?
A boomboxer.
What do you call a smart blonde Labrador?
What happens when you eat a cat?
I love to eat cats for dinner!
What do you call crabs that do not share their food?
They are shellfish! (ノ≧∀≦)ノ
When can an elephant use an umbrella and not get wet?
When it's not raining.
Your mama is so fat that when she went to the scale, it said, "No elephants allowed!"
How do you make a cat sound like a dog? Pour gasoline on it, then light it on fire and it will go "WOOF!"
How do you make a dog sound like a cat? Put it in the deep freeze until frozen solid, then run it through an electric saw and it will go "MMMRROWWWWWW!"
What's the difference between a bird and an emo?
Birds fly.
Yo hairline is so long, when you looked in a mirror you saw an entire endangered species.
What does a squirrel eat? Deez Nutz in their mouth.
What's a cat's favorite instrument? Purr-cussion.
- What do you call a dog that can do magic?
- A labracadabrador.
Watchdogs.