Animal jokes
Why did the rooster go to the train station to get the pizza?
One time, I worked at the zoo and I was feeding the monkeys.
And one of them μяɨɲąţ€ď on me.
And I went to the hospital and got a bloody nose the next day.
What do you call a deer with no ear?
One ear.
What's every elderly person's spirit animal? The blue tang fish.
Yo hairline is so long, when you looked in a mirror you saw an entire endangered species.
Memes
What does a squirrel eat? Deez Nutz in their mouth.
What's a cat's favorite instrument? Purr-cussion.
Hey, pass me that crowbar, please.
Sure... y’know, before the crowbar was invented, crows had to drink at home.
How many potatoes to feed the elephant?
What's a rapper's favorite kind of pet?
A boomboxer.
What do you call a smart blonde Labrador?
What happens when you eat a cat?
I love to eat cats for dinner!
- What do you call a dog that can do magic?
- A labracadabrador.
Watchdogs.
What do you call a rapper who LOVES to fish?
MC Hammerhead.
What's the difference between a bird and an emo?
Birds fly.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
To get to KFC.
Where did the cows go to a date?
To the moo-vies!
Why did the chicken cross the road?
To get to the other side.
Worst joke ever.
Did you hear about the new doggy condos?
Apparently they are now releasing!