Animal jokes
The thing about animals is every time you pick one up, you have to put it down.
Q: What is a baby's favorite reptile?
A: A rattlesnake.
What do you get when you cross a bunny and a Honda? Just the Honda.
Susie: Ling Ling, truth or dare?
Ling Ling: Truth.
Susie: What happened to Stacie's dog?
Ling Ling: Dare.
Why would you never donate to crabs?
Because they're shellfish!
Memes
A stupid dolphin makes an annoying noise.
The dolphin did it on porpoise.
What do birds use to check their grades?
Air-ies...
Why are trees afraid of dogs? Because they bark.
What is the difference between an egg and you? An egg gets laid, and you don't.
Why did the elephant get kicked out of the public pool?
Because he kept on dropping his trunks! 🤣🤣🤣🤣
Squirrel: I got a joke.
Dog: What the hell is it?
Squirrel: I clicked my nuts and clicked my poop.
Did you hear about the goldfish that went bankrupt?
Now he's a bronze fish.
There were two snakes slithering along when one snake said to the other snake, "Are we poisonous?" "Idk why?" The other snake responded, "'Cause I just bit my tongue!"
Why did the dog cross the road?
It didn't. Got hit by a car on the way to the other side.
Is your middle name Fancy Feast?
'Cause your face looks like a can of dog food.
Pigeons can be annoying at times, especially when their bones get stuck in-between your teeth.
Mufasa is proof that cats don't always land on their feet.
There was a dino at the library today.
It was reading a thesaurus.
How do goldfish know when to eat?
They don't. They have a memory span of 3 seconds.
Why did the cow cross the road?
To get to the Moo-vie theater.