Instrument

Instrument jokes

Survey

According to a recent survey, replacing words with the names of musical instruments in a sentence often goes undetected.

Scar

Someone asked me, "What are them scars on your arm?" I thought I was playing a violin.

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  • Whistle

    I bought a wooden whistle. But it wouldn't whistle, so I bought a steel whistle. But it still wouldn't whistle. So I bought a lead whistle, but it still wouldn't lead me to whistle.

    Memes

    Skeleton

    I hear skeletons like to play the saxaBONE, though I think the tromBONE would be better, but tibia honest, both can be HUMERUS, wouldn't wanna hurt your funny bone, but I think your starting to get BONELY so I'll stop pulling your leg. Now get out before I give you a bad time.

    Cow

    What do you call a cow who plays an instrument? -- A moosician.

    Flute

    How do you cover 12 holes with one hole?

    Take a flute and shove it up your ass.

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  • Priest

    Why do Priests like playing the violin? They get to finger A minor.

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  • Pianist

    Why did the pianist keep banging his head against the keys? He was playing by ear.

    Michael Jackson

    What's the difference between Michael Jackson and a guitar teacher? One likes to stroke his finger across A minor, and the other one plays guitar.

    Organ Donor

    My grandma refused to be an organ donor. She was buried with all her musical instruments.

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  • Dog

    Why did the dog join the marching band?

    Because he had his trum-bone.

    Dad

    My dad is so good at instruments, he said he loves to finger "a minor."