Instrument jokes
According to a recent survey, replacing words with the names of musical instruments in a sentence often goes undetected.
What do you call two Hispanics with Parkinson's disease?
Maracas.
Sans: What am I using?
A trom-bone!
"Banjo players spend half their lives tuning... and the other half out of tune."
I'm a banjo picker, and I can confirm this is 99% true.
Do you want to know why I hired a protractor to tutor my nephew in IIROC? Because he has degrees. 180 of them. So he's smar[t].
Drums at Performance
Today I heard someone playing "Dancing Queen" on the didgeridoo.
It was very Abba-riginal.
What do you call an autistic person playing a guitar?
Guarded.
What bathroom does a trumpet go to?
The brass room...
What is the skeleton's favorite instrument?
A xylophone.
What is the difference between a guitar and a fish?
You can't tuna fish.
After an unsuccessful harvest, why did the farmer decide to try a career in music?
Because he had a ton of sick beets.
My favorite instrument? The TromBONE, of course.
What's the difference between a fish and a guitar?
You can tuna guitar, but you can't tuna fish!
What is Rapboat's favorite musical note? A minor.
Why don’t violists play hide and seek?
Because no one will look for them.
Q. What makes music on your hair?
A. A headband!
One of the reasons the skeleton was not allowed to play church music is because he had no organs.
Make like a drum and beat it!
A bass drum is the boss.
Why did the priest want to learn how to play the organ?
He wanted to be able to finger A minor.