Aed jokes
What do you call a stand-up comedian if the comedian doesn’t have legs?
A dick has a sad life. His hair's a mess, his family is nuts, his neighbor's an asshole, his best friend's a pussy, and his owner beats him.
What do you call a tall terrorist? Labomb James.
White girl: So this crystal cures my depression and helps me lose weight?
Me holding a rock of meth: YES!!!
What do you call Dr. Disrespect on top of a building?
Diddler on the Roof.
How many LGBT supporters does it take to change a lightbulb?
The lightbulb is fine the way it is. Society just needs to change the way it looks at it.
I have a dog named Syndrome.
But it gets kinda awkward when he jumps on someone and I have to shout, "DOWN SYNDROME!"
I told her she needed to put her dog on a leash, and her boyfriend is still on a leash to this day. 😮💨
My grandpa is a great hero. He's the one who shot Hitler.
I think it’s dumb that people say a woman belongs in the kitchen.
How else is the rest of the house going to get cleaned?
Q: Why was the gay man fired from the sperm bank?
A: He got caught drinking on the job.
Those rape alarms give you a headache, don't they?
What do you call a cut cucumber?
A guy with no legs.
Hey girl, are you a drill sergeant, because you have my privates' attention.
Chuck Norris once stared a basilisk in the eye, and it DIED!
Q: What is it called when a hoe is getting ready for her party but doesn't know what to wear but is thinking about it? A: A thotprosses
What do you call a sandwich 🥪 full of envy?
Peanut Butter n' Jealousy! 😂
What do tigers wear in the winter?
A striped sweater.
If I send a clown to deliver flowers to my wife...
...is that a romantic jester?
What do you call an acid with a bad attitude?
A-Mean-O-Acid.