You jokes
Doesn't having depersonalization mean that you're like the animatronics off of FNAF/Five Nights at Freddy's?
(If you don't know what depersonalization is, look it up.)
What do you call a person that is both Black and Hispanic and was born on Wednesday? Miérkoolaids.
If you’re American when you go in the bathroom...
... and American when you come out, what are you in the bathroom?
European.
When the bully says, "You're adopted," so you hit him with, "At least someone wanted me!"
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
I did app.
I did app who?
You did a poo.
What do visiting Goatman's Bridge and a bungee jumping accident have in common?
You hear a snap, and suddenly you're falling from a bridge.
What's the difference between a gay guy and a freezer?
The freezer doesn't fart when you pull the meat out.
What do you call a group of emos? The suicide squad.
Friend A: Do you like Wendy's?
Friend B: Yes, why?
Friend A: Wen-dez nuts in your mouth!
Did you know that lots of graves are put in churchyards?
Yeah, they're pretty holey.
There are only women's rights causes because they leave you.
When you're working in the Twin Towers, but you have to turn your computer to airplane mode.
You're so fat that when you got to McDonald's, they had to call Wendy's for backup.
"Knock, knock." "Who's there?" "Knock, knock, knock, knock, knock." "Who?" "Knock, knock you."
McDonald's worker be like, "Hello, would you like a Mc-Dick?" (You looked down) You: "Uhh, where's my dick?"
What's bigger than Kurt Cobain's head?
What do you mean? He doesn't have one.
What do you call an LGBTQ+ plane?
A biplane.
You can get the park in the park with you if I have park in your car, and I will be there in a couple of hours. Would you be able to pick them out at your house, and I will pick you up, and I will be at your place at your convenience. I can get them in a little while. I’m at the park. Bye.
His neighbor asked Hodja,
"Do you have some forty-year-old vinegar?"
"I have," answered Hodja.
"Would you give me some? I need it to prepare a medication," said the man.
"No, I won't," replied Hodja. "If I had given some to everybody who asked for it, would I have it for forty years?"
One night a guy asked his wife where she wanted to eat. She said, "Chinese food," so he flew her to China. The next night, he asked her what she wanted to eat. She said, "Indian food," so he flew her to India. The last night, he said, "What do you want to eat?" and she said she wanted nothing, so he flew her to Africa.