Did you hear about the kidnapping at school? Don’t worry, he woke up.
In my basement.
You Jokes
A man walks into an enchanted forest and tries to cut down a talking tree.
“You can’t cut me down,” the tree exclaims, “I’m a talking tree!” The man responds, “You may be a talking tree, but you will have dialogue.”
You know why morning food digests so quickly.
Because it breaks fast.
You know why the Twin Towers were more remembered? A hexagon is more commendable than a pentagon.
I love you all the way to Uranus! 🤣
Hi Leyla, I have been trying to reach you for a while. Where have you been? I was wondering if you wanted to chat.
What do you call a cow with no legs?
(Answer) Ground beef.
Sorry for a bad joke.
What do you call a one-legged China man?
Ty Whon Shu.
My friend said this to me: "Were you born on a highway? Because that's where most accidents happen." :(
I saw that my brother has brain cancer, so I asked him: "Are you big brain?"
To the guy in a wheelchair who stole my camouflage coat: you can hide, but you can't run.
All of a guy's sons came out gay. He ordered 10 shots in a bar.
The bartender asks, "Do you have anyone in your family who likes women?"
The man said, "My wife does!"
What's one advantage of being an orphan?
Nobody can make mama jokes about you. 🌚
I have 206 bones. When I look at you, I have 207.
(insert funny joke about a dick here).
Did you laugh? Be honest.
Girl: Dad, where are you?
Dad: I went to go get milk.
Girl: But we have milk.
Dad: I know, I just don't love you.
I was spending my holiday in Paris with my gf. As we were walking near the city, a meteor hit and killed my gf.
Forensics did an autopsy on the corpse and concluded that someone missed a pen and hit my gf from the PSG training ground. SHAME ON YOU PESSI FOR RUINING MY LIFE! 🤬😡
What is an orphan's least favorite show? “How I Met Your Mother.”
How it be when the new guy takes too long...
Hay Danny, it's me Johnny.
Johnny: Boss says to kill the guy in red. Point the gun at his head.
Danny: Ok, target locked. 3... 2... 1... bang.
Johnny: Danny, hope you did not get the man in red.
Danny: OH MY BRO FOR REALL.
You're so ugly that when you walk past the toilet, it flushes itself.
