You jokes
Julie: What's the difference between a chimp and a pizza?
John: I don't know.
Julie: Remind me not to send you to the store...
What do you get if you cross an apple with a shellfish?
A crab apple!
What do you call a cow with no legs?
Ground beef! (aka dinner)
What do you do when an orphan is taking a photo?
Yell "FAMILY PICTURES!"
What do you call a pig that knows karate? A pork chop.
I like ramen. If you do, like!
Hey Gwen, how are you? I'm a girl, btw...;)
What are you willing to write in your notebook? These nuts.
Did you know Helen had a playhouse in her backyard? Neither did she!
Boss: Why are you so bad at driving trains? How many have you derailed this year?
Me: Sorry, boss, it’s hard to keep track.
What's the difference between you and my dad? You come home.
Hey selfish king, I see you need a girlfriend ;)
What’s the difference between 69 and High School?
In 69 you usually only kiss one c*nt and look at one a**hole.
What do you call an orphan in Alabama?
A virgin.
What did the bee say to the flower?
"Hey bud! When do you open?"
"Bonus, we can even watch a movie and still chat! Love you!
Which one do you want to watch? 😀"
A girl with no arms and one leg goes to her mother and asks: "Mom, next year for the carnival, can I dress up as a princess?"
The mother replies: "Why? Didn't you like the ice lolly dress from last year?"
Imagine you go to school, right? You hit the curve, the bus driver be like, "Ahhh, how do I stop the bus?" Students from the bus jump from the windows. One of the students: "That's a YOU problem."
I lick poo for a living... You?
What do you call a Jedi teacher who lives in a forest?
Obi-Wan Canopy