Wordplay jokes

You might think these jokes are plane.

What do you call a person with no body and no nose? "Nobody knows."

What's the difference between a dirty bus stop and a lobster with boobs?

One is a crusty bus station and the other is a busty crustacean.

Show me a piano falling down a mineshaft, and I’ll show you A-flat minor.

All of you guys in this orphanage are ABCDEFGHIJK.

What's that? said the orphans.

Attractive, brilliant, cute, darling, elegant, funny, gorgeous, and hot.

What's the IJK?

I'm just kidding! 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

You want some dead batteries? They're free of charge.

The Breakfast Couples: (Bacon) - Don't go bacon my heart.

(Egg) - I couldn't if I fried.

What do you call a horse rider with Down syndrome?

Down Quijote.

What unit of measurement is used on farms? Barn yards.

I was gonna tell a dead baby joke, but I decided to abort.

What do you call a clever clock?

Clockwise.

What's a skeleton's favorite instrument? The exylo-bone!

What do you call a man off the ground?

Hanged.

So there's this uncle of female and male twins, and his sister, the mother of the twins, is stuck trying to think of a name for the children. The uncle says, "I've got an idea!", and the mother gets excited, thinking this could be it. She says, "What should their names be?"

The uncle replies, "Well for your daughter, Denise." "That's a nice name," comments the mother, "but what about my son?" The uncle simply replies, "Denephew".

"Man, your jokes about homicide are totally killer!"

Why does Michael Jackson like 44-year-olds? There's 4 of them.

What do you call a ghost bee?

Boobees.

I once told a chemistry joke... sadly, it got no reaction.

What do you call it when a man is scared in Panera Bread?

Panera dread.

What starts with "s" and ends with "erm"? SuperM.

This means both "matrix" and "master" so take out the "u" and then you just get "master". When you think of sperm, you think of porn. If you're a master at something, you're also a star at it. So you get porn star.