Donald Trump was golfing with Barack Obama. The Donald said, "Listen Barack, I'm getting older and I'm having trouble sexually satisfying my young wife. I know that you black guys are supposed to be magic in bed. Can you give me a few pointers?" Barack gave Donald a few ideas and that night Donald made love to his wife. He did everything he was told. He started out slowly entering his wife gently then finished hard. Melania came quickly screaming. "Oh Donald, You fuck just like Barack Obama."
Chalie has an eating disorder and he is shorter so is his life but he will never get a wife he's a gay mother fucker who wants to be hit by a trucker?
one day a man was walking in a ally when a crack head atakes him so then man shoots him in the head and runs inside his home when he gose to his wife she asks him if he saw her dad.
2 drunk men spot a pig on some old farmers land.And they were real hungry (or so they said) and they both decided to take the pig with them into their car and eat it somewhere.And so they did and the farmer came out with a gun while they hurriedly drove off, and the farmer said "well goddammit if it was a pig they wanted why didn't they just take my wife".
Three men die the same time and I'll go to heaven to go find St Peter St Peter says to them is going to be a long journey to heaven so I will give you a good vehicle depending on how much you've cheated on your wives we'll start with you Michael since you were quite the womanizer you and cheating on your on your wife multiple times you will be getting a Toyota the man embarrassed left in the Toyota Nolan you you were better you cheated on your wife twice so I will give you a Mercedes now for now as for you mark you never cheated on your wife you are an absolute saint so I will be giving you a Lamborghini and the Man in the Toyota saw the man with the Lamborghini the next day crying like a child on his car and he and the Man in the Toyota what the hell is going on and the Man in the Lamborghini says I was through streets of Heaven and so my wife riding in roller skates
What is 6" long, bright red and your wife cries when you feed it to her?
Her miscarriage.
Once, there was a couple about to have sex. "I have something to confess," said the shy wife. The husband then said, "Whatever it is, I will still love." The wife then said "Honey, I flat chested. The husband said, "It's okay, I'm a baby down there anyways." He then pulled down his pants and began to have sex. The next day, the wife said "I thought you were a baby down there." The husband then said "I am; 22 inches and 7 pounds."...
when your wife take 30mins to get ready. me: takes five mins. me: hun YOU DONE YET!!!
My wife was going to have a abortion and I have cancer Ha Ha Ha
I thought it was funny
jfk wife trying to grab his head be like him in haven why did i marrei her welp time for a devorsin
"guess what my wife left in the freezer"
"her miscarriage"
Guy walks into the house carrying a sheep and says out loud this is the pig I screw when your on the rag and is wife replies that's not a pig its a sheep and he says I was talking to the sheep.
What did the man say to his wife, wanna play
My indian wife said last night if her fanny would taste like vindaloo curry, i said ive smelt your fucking armpits youve got no chance
The teacher asked the class what they wanted to be when they grew up Johnny said when he grows up hes going to be A motherfuking Hustler he's going to have a wife and live in a big house in the country with maids and butlers and drive a rolls- Royce and he's also going to have apartment in the City where his side bitch is going to live he's going to buy her expensive jewelry whatever she wants cars diamonds clothes shoes the teacher didn't know what to say so she calls on Sally what do you want to be when you grow up? Sally said I want to be Johnny's bitch.
Whats between a wife and a husband?
A divorce
My ex-wife was smoking pot with Snow White, when the 7 dwarf's saw them they sang... "Look at those high Ho's! Hiiiiiiii Hoooooo'sssss!!!!"
My wife asked me to get her a puppy. I agreed and went to an animal shelter, as I was searching for a puppy, a fire was set and the entire animal shelter was burned down. A few hours later I returned to my wife. She knew I had no puppies and asked why, I replied "I couldn't find any" She understood but was upset, so I gave her something that I did get. She said, "Wow! This is good, what smokehouse did you get this at?
how did the guy greet his wife howdy sister
Zion is so fat that his dick cant even fit in his wifes pussy
