Ex-wife

Ex-Wife Jokes

My ex-wife was smoking pot with Snow White, when the 7 dwarf's saw them they sang... "Look at those high Ho's! Hiiiiiiii Hoooooo'sssss!!!!"

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37. After 5 long years of studying, a student comes rushing into Einstein's office shouting... "Sir, Sir, I finally understand your theory of Special Relativity!" Einstein rolls his eyes, "It's about time".

38. An eight-year old boy had never spoken a word. One afternoon, as he sat eating his lunch he turned to his mother and said, "The soup is cold." His astonished mother exclaimed, "Son, I've waited so long to hear you speak. But all these years you never said a thing. Why haven't you spoken before?" The boy looked at her and replied, "Up until now, everything has been satisfactory."

39. A fellow was walking along a country road when he came upon a farmer working in his field. The man called out to the farmer, "How long will it take me to get to the next town?" The farmer didn't answer. The guy waited a bit and then started walking again. After the man had gone about a hundred yards, the farmer yelled out "About 20 minutes!" "Thank you. But why didn't you tell me that when I asked you?" "Didn't know how fast you could walk".

40. A Husband and Wife at Custody court. The judge looks sternly at the ex wife. Judge: "Why do you think you deserve custody of the child?" Ex wife: "I brought him into this world so I should have custody of him." Judge: "That is a simple yet good reason." Then the judge looks towards the Ex husband. Judge: "Why do you think you deserve custody of the child, sir?" The ex husband thought long and hard about his response, after a brief moment of silence, he replies, "If I put money into a Pepsi machine and a Pepsi comes out. Is it mine or the machines?"

some guy was mad at his ex wife! so he threw a bottle of alcohol into her house when he was drunk. And realized when he was being questioned for arson, his cigarette was in the rim of the bottle.

Living in Houston Texas and realizing that hurricanes are a annual threat my ex wife call me and ask what would be the safest route to get out of Houston to avoid a hurricane. My answer take the 610 loop dear

Im deaf. My deaf ex-wife cheated on me with a guy who i met on a deaf social trip who was also deaf. I guess i didnt see the signs at the time.

Why does my cheating ex-wife wear a colostomy bag?

She lost her ass playing poker...