My ex-wife still misses me. But her aim is steadily improving.
A friend of mine just got divorced. He and his ex-wife split the house. He got the outside.
My ex-wife was deaf. She left me for a deaf friend of hers. To be honest, I should have seen the signs.
Suicide is as easy as my ex wife
My Ex wife still misses me, but her aim is getting better! Gravity Falls Suckers
My ex-wife misses me, but her aim is getting better.
What did the snail say to his ex-wife? I'm still leaving you!
My ex-wife was smoking pot with Snow White, when the 7 dwarf's saw them they sang... "Look at those high Ho's! Hiiiiiiii Hoooooo'sssss!!!!"
some guy was mad at his ex wife! so he threw a bottle of alcohol into her house when he was drunk. And realized when he was being questioned for arson, his cigarette was in the rim of the bottle.
Living in Houston Texas and realizing that hurricanes are a annual threat my ex wife call me and ask what would be the safest route to get out of Houston to avoid a hurricane. My answer take the 610 loop dear
On my signal, I would like you to drive onto the pavement (sidewalk) and run over my ex-wife.
Peanuts are hard to crack just like my ex wifes heart
This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
I wish my ex wife would take me back. :(
What has two legs, two arms, one dead and covered in red? My ex wife.
Im deaf. My deaf ex-wife cheated on me with a guy who i met on a deaf social trip who was also deaf. I guess i didnt see the signs at the time.
Why does my cheating ex-wife wear a colostomy bag?
She lost her ass playing poker...
37. After 5 long years of studying, a student comes rushing into Einstein's office shouting... "Sir, Sir, I finally understand your theory of Special Relativity!" Einstein rolls his eyes, "It's about time".
38. An eight-year old boy had never spoken a word. One afternoon, as he sat eating his lunch he turned to his mother and said, "The soup is cold." His astonished mother exclaimed, "Son, I've waited so long to hear you speak. But all these years you never said a thing. Why haven't you spoken before?" The boy looked at her and replied, "Up until now, everything has been satisfactory."
39. A fellow was walking along a country road when he came upon a farmer working in his field. The man called out to the farmer, "How long will it take me to get to the next town?" The farmer didn't answer. The guy waited a bit and then started walking again. After the man had gone about a hundred yards, the farmer yelled out "About 20 minutes!" "Thank you. But why didn't you tell me that when I asked you?" "Didn't know how fast you could walk".
40. A Husband and Wife at Custody court. The judge looks sternly at the ex wife. Judge: "Why do you think you deserve custody of the child?" Ex wife: "I brought him into this world so I should have custody of him." Judge: "That is a simple yet good reason." Then the judge looks towards the Ex husband. Judge: "Why do you think you deserve custody of the child, sir?" The ex husband thought long and hard about his response, after a brief moment of silence, he replies, "If I put money into a Pepsi machine and a Pepsi comes out. Is it mine or the machines?"
