Wheres jokes
Where do mathematicians go to die?
The symmetry.
Where is the cheapest gun range? Your local public school.
Why are there more female history teachers than male?
Because women like to bring up the past.
Why do vegans like to make their food look and taste like meat?
Same reason lesbians use strap-ons. They still like putting meat in their hole, but they don’t like where real meat comes from.
I went over to a crying child and said, "Where are your parents?" God, I love working at an orphanage!
I saw an orphan in the grocery store and asked him, "Where's your mom?" and he cried. Why?
Official Dj Penaldo playlist.
1. "I'm a fraud" 2. "I need you (ft. Tap-ins)" 3. "I Want to Leave Mid United" 4. "Back where I belong (ft. Europa league)" 5. "TY Eder" 6. "Nobody wants me (Rejectnaldo Remix)" 7. "Fuck that kid (ft. Lil Broke phone)" 8. "Sewy (Benched +arms crossed version)"
My parents told me I was born on the highway.
Apparently that’s where most accidents happen.
When you can’t see your adopted joke pop up, it’s the same as asking your adopted friend where their parents are and never finding it.
When David lost his ID, I called him Dave. Where did Dave go during the bombing? Everywhere. Guess who came crawling back?
"Why did Susie fall off the swing?" "Because she had no arms."
"Why couldn’t she get up off the ground?" "Because she had no friends."
"Knock knock." "Who’s there?" "Not Susie, she’s still on the ground."
"Where did Susie go when the bomb went off?" "Everywhere."
"Why couldn’t Susie scratch her leg?" "Because it was in a different body bag."
"Why did Susie drop her ice cream?" "She was hit by a bus."
"Why did Susie fall off the swing?" "Someone threw a refrigerator at her."
An artist is commissioned to create a painting celebrating Soviet-Polish friendship, to be called "Lenin in Poland." When the painting is unveiled at the Kremlin, there is a gasp from the invited guests.
The painting depicts Lenin's wife naked in bed with Leon Trotsky.
"But this is a travesty! Where is Lenin?" asks one of the guests.
"Lenin is in Poland," replies the painter.
Where does an orphan come from?
Daddy getting milk.
I'll never forget my Grandad's last words... "Son, where did you get a grenade from?!"
Where do fish keep their money?
In a riverbank!
My aunt visited and saw all of the stuff around the house my mom had kept over the years and said, "If you have something that no one likes, and it only makes people upset, or it's useless, throw it away."
The next time my aunt visited, she said, "Where is your daughter?"
My mom said, "I took your advice."
What were Stephen's last words? “Battery low.”
When my grandpa was 65, he decided to run a mile a day to keep fit.
He's 70 now, and we have no idea where he is.
Where does a crayon go on vacation? To color-ado.
Why can’t orphans play baseball?
Because they don’t know where home is.