Susie Jokes

Lil Timmy and Lil Susie are taking a bath together. Lil Susie looks down and says, "hey what's that?" Lil Timmy looks down and says, "oh that, that's only my little red race car." They continue on with their bath.

Then Lil Timmy looks down and says, "hey what's that?" Lil Susie looks down and says, "oh that, that's only my little red race car garage." They continue with their bath. Then Lil Susie says, "hey, what if we try to put your little red race car in my little red race car garage."

The parents downstairs then hear a bloody scream. They rush upstairs and then say, "what's wrong?" Lil Susie says, "well Lil Timmy tried to put his little red race car in my little red race car garage but the back wheels wouldn't fit so we cut them off."

“Why did Susie fall off the swing?” “Because she had no arms”

“Why could she get up off the ground?” “Because she had no friends”

“Knock knock” “Who’s there?” “Not Susie, she’s still on the ground”

“Where did Susie go when the bomb went off?” “Everywhere” “Why couldn’t Susie scratch her leg?” “Because it was in a different body bag”

“Why did Susie drop her ice cream?” “She was hit by a bus”

“Why did Susie fall off the swing?” “Someone threw a refrigerator at her”

whyd susie go down the the slide too fast?

because her wheelchair was good

One day, Little Susie got her monthly bleeding for the first time in her life.

Not quite certain what was happening, and somewhat frightened, she decided to tell Little Johnny. Little Susie dropped her panties and showed Little Johnny what was happening.

Little Johnny's eyes opened wide in amazement. "You know," he said, "I'm not a doctor, but it looks like someone just ripped your balls off!"

So little Susie came home and said “mom little johnny show me his pecker”. And her mom said WHAT?! And little Susie was like yea it reminded me of a peanut, her mom said oh because it was so small. Susie said no because it tasted salty.

A teacher asks her class, “What do you want to be when you grow up?” Little Johnny says “I wanna be a billionaire, going to the most expensive clubs, take the best b*tch with me, give her a Ferrari worth over a million bucks, an apartment in Hawaii, a mansion in Paris, a jet to travel through Europe, an Infinite Visa Card and to make love to her three times a day”. The teacher, shocked, and not knowing what to do with the bad behavior of the child, decides not to give importance to what he said and then continues the lesson. “And you, Susie? ” the teacher asks. Susie says “I wanna be Johnny’s b*tch.”

Little Susie had gotten her first period. She told her mom and they bought pads. The next month, Susie's mom asked if she had her second one. Suzie said no and her mom fainted

Why did Susie fall off the swing? Because she didn’t have any arms. Knock knock Who’s there? Not Susie.

Why couldn’t little Susie stay on the swing? She had no arms

Knock knock Who’s there? Not Susie.

A kindergarten teacher was telling a story...

A kindergarten teacher was telling a story about a farmer walking around the farm talking to the animals. She was trying to get the kids to interact, speak up, and to use their imaginations.

"Mister Farmer stopped at the cow, and the cow said 'Morning, Mister Farmer!'. Susie, what do you thing the farmer said next?"

Susie says "He said 'Good morning Mrs. Cow!'"

"Mister Farmer stopped at the pig next, and the pig said 'Good morning, Mister Farmer!'. Johnny, what do you thing the farmer said next?" Johnny says "He said 'Good morning Mr. Pig!'"

"Mister Farmer stopped at the chicken, and the Chicken said 'Morning, Mister Farmer!'. Billy, what do you thing the farmer said next?" Billy says "The farmer said 'Holy shit, that chicken is fucking talking!'"

Susie- Ling Ling Truth Or Dare Ling Ling- Truth Susie- What HAppened To Stacie's Dog? Ling Ling-Dare

Why did Susie fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms.

Knock knock Who's there? Not Susie.

Why did Susie get cut from the soccer team? She has no legs! Who broke into my house by kicking down my door? Not Susie... But she still is in my basement, since she can't run!

Why did lil Susie fall off the swing? She didn’t have any arms. Knock knock, Who’s there? Not lil Susie

Where did Susie go after the bomb exploded? ...... Everywhere.

A rapist walks into a school and asks if they had 5 year olds in the school and the teacher replies "are you that same person who took Jimmy?" the man replies "yes" and the teacher says "Take susie too she's being a little bitch."