Map Jokes

My family is like a treasure.

You need a map and shovel to find them.

You are walking through the woods when you cross a woman who has been raped and beheaded. What is the first thing you do?

Check your map, you’re obviously going in circles.

If you want to see my foes, bring a shovel and bring a map and a getaway car just in case we get caught.

What did the two crewmates say when they were hanging on a rope? Polus up!

Your forehead is so big that it's visible on the world map!

I've been trying to use Google Maps in Ukraine, but I couldn't because I only saw Russia.

What do you do when you see a naked dead girl?

Check your map, you're obviously going in circles.

One day, two friends found a treasure map. So they decided to try to find the treasure.

After several hours they found the treasure. It was a suit that gives the person wearing it super strength. One of the friends wore the suit and hugged the other friend. They were both red.

Why did an orphan go on Google Maps?

To try and find their parents.

You are so adopted that you don't have a home button on Google Maps.

Say "eye," smell "map," say "ness."

(I am a penis!) HA HA!

Your hairline is so big it took your mom a map to find it.

A guy walks into an AA meeting and asks for a road map.

Yo, barber fucked up so bad he pulled out a "Plants vs. Zombies" map and that shii fit perfectly.

What is a geographical discovery? Little Johnny found his geography homework undone.

I made Google Earth for orphan kids.

Sadly, it does not show where home is.

I have a thousand-piece puzzle of the Japanese map. It took me ages to finish it.

But after the earthquake, I just threw all the pieces on the ground, and it's done.

You are my compass; without you, I’m lost.

What do you call an alligator that reads maps? Navigator.

It was a sunny day and I was in school. I had history lessons and we had a cool subject! The subject was about Penaldo, the man who statpadded against small teams and camped in the pen spot! Our teacher showed us a map with marked countries in which Penaldo dived like a dolphin!