Violence jokes
A pirate walks into a tavern with a pirate ship attached to his nutty wuttys. It's driving me nuts!
A troll proceeds to pull out a desert eagle and shoot the pirate in the face. He makes a poggers face and says, "Problem??"
How do you affirm a trans woman's gender?
By kicking him hard in the balls.
How do you prevent a physics teacher from drowning? Shoot her before she touches the water.
What do you call Helen Keller after she killed 10 people?
Helen Killer.
How do you make a trash can leak?
Hit it with an axe until it becomes part of the cosmos!
How do you help a rape victim on a diet lose 7 pounds?
Kill her afterwards.
Why did the terrorist not get paid, but they loved their job?
They di2s drying plans.
If you're bored, punch an orphan. What are they gonna do? Tell their parents?
Guns control.
How do you get ten babies in a bucket?
With a blender.
What's the difference between PMS and a terrorist?
You can negotiate with the terrorist.
During the Great War, a man holding a machine gun shoots down a swarm of soldiers running on a swamp.
He says: "You came to the wrong swamp, Americans! You came to the wrong swamp!" *He didn't stop firing.*
Slay.
If there's ever a shooting at school, pull out an Uno reverse card.
How many babies does it take to cover a brick wall?
Depends on how hard you throw it. 😆😂😁
What’s red, 11 inches, and makes my girlfriend cry when I slap her with it?
Her miscarriage.
A guy walks into a bar with a 44 magnum and yells, "Who the fuck fucked my wife?" The guy behind the bar says, "Mate, you don't have enough bullets!"
Me: Hey, apple.
Apple: What?
Me: Knife.
Apple: Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhh!
Clear all your debts with one easy payment. Buy a shotgun and blow your head off.
Suicide bombers, carry bombs and remember to breathe.