By using this site, you agree to its use of cookies. Read more

The oldest computer can be traced back to Adam and Eve. It was an apple but with extremely limited memory. Just 1 byte. And then everything crashed.

What do emos and apples have in common?

They both hang on trees.

An apple and an emo kid fall off a tree at the same time. Who hits the ground first?

The apple because the emo kid got caught by the rope

Chuck Norris can pick an apple from an orange tree and make the best lemonade you’ve ever tasted.

The first computer dates back to Adam and Eve. It was an Apple with limited memory, just one byte. And then everything crashed.

What’s worse than finding a worm I your apple?

The holocaust.

An apple a day can do so much more than keep the doctor away… it can keep ANYONE away.

if you throw it hard enough.

Why did the blondie put her ipad in the blender: to make apple juice.

Whats the difference between apples and dead babies? I don’t ejaculate on apples before i eat them

A is for apple, B is for dyslexia- oh wait no! That’s d!

An apple a day, or you’ll die any way

What do apples and witches have in common? They both hang on trees.

What’s the difference between an apple and a dead baby? I don’t jizz on a apple before eating it

where do u take Stephen hawking when he dies

the apple repair store

If you have 20 apples and you ate 2 how many you have left? 0 because you have 20 and and take away 2 you have 0 left.

Little Jimmy has 5 red apples. His dad’s car will arrive in 20 minutes. Calculate the mass of the Sun

three indans get captured by an enemy leader and the leaders says "go in the woods and find 10 fruits of the same kind.The first one comes back with apples.The enemy leader says "shove them up your butt and don’t make a sound or i will kill you.He get to two and yell.The leader killed him.He goes up to heaven.The second guy come back and has grapes he gets to 9 and laughes.The leader kills him.He goes to heavenThe first guy askes the second guy why did you laugh you had it in the bag.The second guy said he say the third guy carring pineapples.

One apple a day keeps the doctor away, not logging onto servers using management or service accounts keeps SecOps people away.

Why should you never fart in an Apple store? Because they have no Windows!

A man bought a brand new iphone but returned it, why The apple was already bitten.