Vehicle jokes
What is the difference between a Porsche and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Porsche in my garage.
What's the difference between a bus full of children and a fish?
The fish can swim.
Why did the frog take the train to work? His car got toad.
What’s the difference between a Lamborghini and kids?
I don’t have a Lamborghini in my garage.
A blonde starts a new job at a local car dealership when a wealthy gentleman comes in looking for a spacious car for his large family. The blonde is excited as she gets commission, so eagerly shows him the most expensive SUVs.
The gentleman has a good look around before saying to the blonde, "It looks perfect.... But cargo space?" To which she instantly replied, "Oh, I'm sorry, sir, car only for road."
One day a mom who looked like a pig broke the car down.
What do you call a guy in a wheelchair that walks into a fire?
Hot Wheels.
Q: What do you call a pigeon that is full of poop that flies in front of a car?
A: A suicide bomber.
What is the difference between a human and a magic car?
A magic car can fly, and a human cannot fly.
What's yellow and can't swim?
A bus full of toddlers.
How do you blindfold a woman?
Put a windshield in front of them.
What is green and looks like a school bus?
A school bus.
Why was there peanut butter in the middle of the road?
It went with the traffic jam.
I gave her a lift back to her crib because her car wouldn’t start.
My dog was hungry, so I let him loose outside while I filled his bowl.
I found out later that he was run over by a truck. It seemed to really hit the Spot.
Why do y’all call a pickup truck?
'Cause ya got a flat tire.
A man died and went to heaven. Every time you cheat, you get a worse car.
The first man cheated 5 times; he got a Jeep. The second man cheated 3 times; he got a BMW. The third man never cheated; he got a Lamborghini.
The second man saw the third man sad. He said, "Why are you sad?" The third man said, "I saw my wife with a scooter."
What is yellow and can't swim?
A bus full of kids.
What should we want?
Racecars.
When should we want them?
NEOWWWWWWWWWWWM!
What's the difference between dead babies and a Ferrari?
I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.