Vehicle jokes
What is the difference between a human and a tree? A human being is the one who can drive.
What's Stephen Hawking called on fire?
Hot Wheels :)
What do you call a flying bus?
An Airbus.
My girlfriend said to me, "Dear, I think you have hit an animal, there's blood and dents all over the bonnet."
I said, "No, love, I'm not waiting for a Black Lives Matter rally."
What did the bulldozer say to the house?
"I wanna bulldoze houses!"
How to Make an Orphan cry
Step 1: Talk about Home.
Step 2: Ask them where their parents are.
Step 3: Say, "Bye Bye," and push them in the Batmobile!
Why can't orphans be kidnapped?
Because most kidnappers use a family van.
Your mama is so fat, by the time I swerved to miss her with the car, I ran out of gas.
How many hookers fit in a Cadillac?
About 4 in the trunk if you stack 'em right.
I pushed a kid in a wheelchair into a fire and said, "Hot Wheels!"
When Bob got on that sled, I don't know how he went so smoothly, but that is the invention of bobsled peoples.
And then Mark came in.
Why did the turtle start flying? He was on a jet.
Aaaah, I really wish Stephen Hawking was an organ donor...
I really need some new parts to my go-kart.
What did the bus driver say to the lady with one leg?
Hop on.
Yo mama so stupid, she got hit by a parked car.
Which is redder: a baby or a red car? It depends on how the baby was killed!
What's yellow and can't swim? A bus full of kids.
I go beep like a Jeep.
Roses are red, That's a tin can, You have no home, So get in the van!
Why couldn't the bicycle stand up by itself? It was two tired.