Vehicle jokes
What's yellow and can't swim but screams when it goes under?
A school bus full of kids.
So, a blind man got run over by a car... a parked car.
What is your car you cannot drive? A super flying car!
I like fire trucks and monster trucks.
P = Person (not original "pun")
P1: Hey girl! P2: I got a bf! P1: Well, I got a Lamborghini Aventador, a Bugatti Super Sports, a yacht, and a private plane. P2: BF stand for breakfast. P2: Oh, and also, where did you get all that stuff? P1: GTA5 P2: You motherfucker!!!
(Communications with this person are now blocked)
Memes
Why did the bike fall over?
Because it was two tired.
1: My grandpa died last year.
2: What kind of cancer?
1: He was hit by a bus! It's called bus cancer.
You don't need a license to drive a sandwich.
My blind friend got ran over by a parked car.
What do you call a guy on fire in a wheelchair?
Hot wheels.
What do you call a Mexican without a car?
Carlos.
What's the difference between a Lambo and 100 dead babies?
I don't have a Lambo in my garage.
How many times can 46 go into 8? Just hop in the van and find out.
What did the mechanic say to the other mechanic when he broke the car?
"How will we wrench ourselves out of this?"
Yo mama is so dumb, she put speed bumps on the race track.
What can fly underwater?
A mosquito in a submarine.
Luckily, his funeral was a closed casket, sorry, his car blew a gasket.
I asked Stephen if he was an organ donor, and he said why.
I said, "That's a shame. I need parts for my go-cart."
What does Mickey's wife drive?
A Minnie-Van!
What is yellow and brings kids to school every day?