Why did the bike fall over?
Because it was two tired.
1: My grandpa died last year.
2: What kind of cancer?
1: He was hit by a bus! It's called bus cancer.
My blind friend got ran over by a parked car.
What do you call a guy on fire in a wheelchair?
Hot wheels.
What do you call a Mexican without a car?
Carlos.
What's the difference between a Lambo and 100 dead babies?
I don't have a Lambo in my garage.
I asked Stephen if he was an organ donor, and he said why.
I said, "That's a shame. I need parts for my go-cart."
Luckily, his funeral was a closed casket, sorry, his car blew a gasket.
Yo mama is so dumb, she put speed bumps on the race track.
What can fly underwater?
A mosquito in a submarine.
What is yellow and brings kids to school every day?
What did the mechanic say to the other mechanic when he broke the car?
"How will we wrench ourselves out of this?"
How many times can 46 go into 8? Just hop in the van and find out.
A guy crashed his Ford SUV. He couldn't escape.
What does Mickey's wife drive?
A Minnie-Van!
As an American, I like cars. And like all car enthusiasts, even just a little scratch can ruin a brand new car.
So why is it that we go to different countries like India and see that almost every car is completely totaled? I guess we have different meanings of "it's just a scratch."
A Russian wife turned to her husband and asked...
"What's this special military operation our glorious leader keeps talking about?"
Her husband replied, "It's a proxy war between Russia and NATO."
"Oh, right. How's it going?"
"Well," he replied, "so far we've lost 200,000 soldiers, 4,000 tanks, 500 aircraft, numerous helicopters, loads of armoured vehicles and artillery pieces along with our 'flag ship'."
"Wow! What about NATO?"
"They haven't turned up yet."
You don't need a license to drive a sandwich.
How do you fit a whale inside a car? A blender.
What's the difference between a dump truck of dead babies and a Ferrari?
I don't own a Ferrari.
