Vehicle jokes
I like fire trucks and monster trucks.
What is your car you cannot drive? A super flying car!
What do you call a kid that's in the fire? Hot Wheels.
Yo mama is so stupid, she sold her car for gas money.
What's yellow and can't swim but screams when it goes under?
A school bus full of kids.
P = Person (not original "pun")
P1: Hey girl! P2: I got a bf! P1: Well, I got a Lamborghini Aventador, a Bugatti Super Sports, a yacht, and a private plane. P2: BF stand for breakfast. P2: Oh, and also, where did you get all that stuff? P1: GTA5 P2: You motherfucker!!!
(Communications with this person are now blocked)
Why did the bike fall over?
Because it was two tired.
1: My grandpa died last year.
2: What kind of cancer?
1: He was hit by a bus! It's called bus cancer.
Q: What is red, white, and blue and fun to watch?
A: A cop car rolling over after trying to catch someone for speeding.
You don't need a license to drive a sandwich.
What do you call a Mexican without a car?
Carlos.
My blind friend got ran over by a parked car.
What do you call a guy on fire in a wheelchair?
Hot wheels.
What's the difference between a Lambo and 100 dead babies?
I don't have a Lambo in my garage.
What is yellow and brings kids to school every day?
What did the mechanic say to the other mechanic when he broke the car?
"How will we wrench ourselves out of this?"
How many times can 46 go into 8? Just hop in the van and find out.
A guy crashed his Ford SUV. He couldn't escape.
What does Mickey's wife drive?
A Minnie-Van!
I asked Stephen if he was an organ donor, and he said why.
I said, "That's a shame. I need parts for my go-cart."