They're jokes
What does a dad and the Twin Towers have in common?
Once they're gone, they never come back.
You know how in the movie, "Nightmare Before Christmas," they say they're making Christmas?
I thought Mary and Joseph did, but okay.
You should never date a prospector. They're all just gold diggers.
Why do cats like to sing? They're very mewsical!
How do Chinese people name their babies?
They chuck a pan down the stairs.
Memes
im that girl
What do a bungee jump and a hooker have in common?
They’re both cheap, fast, and if the rubber breaks, you’re pretty much screwed.
Don’t stop orphan jokes. They’re funny, and people are just mad that they don’t understand the jokes because they're too STUUUPID.
What do astronauts 👩🚀 do when they’re on break?
They eat launch. 🚀🥪
There were these two guys in a lunatic asylum... and one night, they decide they don't like living in an asylum anymore. They decide they're going to escape!
So, like, they get up onto the roof, and there, just across this narrow gap, they see the rooftops of the town, stretching away in the moonlight... stretching away to freedom. Now, the first guy, he jumps right across with no problem. But his friend, his friend didn't dare make the leap. You see... You see, he's afraid of falling.
So then, the first guy has an idea... He says "Hey! I have my flashlight with me! I'll shine it across the gap between the buildings. You can walk along the beam and join me!" B-but the second guy just shakes his head. He suh-says... He says "Wh-what do you think I am? Crazy? You'd turn it off when I was half way across!"
We shouldn't call gay guys "fucking cunts" because they aren't fucking cunts, they're fucking assholes.
Ugh, I hate anons, they're so anonnoying.
Why do rappers make terrible pirates?
Because they’re always DROPPING HOOKS!
If you don’t know the difference between their, there, and they’re, then you're an idiot.
How are my sister‘s legs and peanut butter alike?\n\nThey’re both smooth and easy to spread.
Why do orphans love a room of mirrors?\n\nBecause they're surrounded by loved ones!
Why do ableist people hate autistics?
They're scared they'll never be special enough.
Do you know why dinosaurs can't eat hyenas?
Because they're dead! The last thing they ate was some rock.
Why do emo kids hate high fives?
They’re always left hanging.
What do ninjas and depressed people have in common?
They're always cutting.
What's the difference between a crumbled man and 9/11... nothing, they're both crumbled.