I tell my therapist I’m scared of the 3rd, 9th, and 15th letter of the alphabet.
Doctor: Oh, I see.
Me: Ahhhh!!!!!
Tell Jokes
You know why eggs can't tell jokes?
They crack each other up!
If you're ever bored, punch an orphan. What are they going to do? Tell their parents?
Q: How do you punish a blind person?
A: Give them a gun and tell them it's a hairdryer.
Hailey: "Hey Brayden!"
Brayden: "Hey!"
*Music roles around*
*I tell Brayden Hailey likes him*
Brayden: "O_O"
Hailey: *Hides*
So sad </3 xD
What is the difference between an orphan and a non-orphan? You can slap the orphan, but not the non-orphan because they can actually tell their parents.
I don't like telling nine eleven jokes, because they always crash and burn.
What does 6 tell 7?
"GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME!"
I was digging and found some gold. I was going to tell my mom, then I remembered why I was digging.
You're walking one day and a little kid, about 5-6 years old, comes up to you asking, "What's a condom?" You have to give that child the wrong answer, what would you tell them? Comment on what you would tell them.
How can you tell that a blonde likes you? She only gives three fucking nights in a row.
When you tell your mom that she is bad at jokes, then she tells you, "Well, I made you!"
Q: How can you tell if a Western is gay?
A: All the good guys are hung.
You have to tell this to a friend:
There are 30 cows in a field. 20 ate 28 chickens. How many didn't? A: 10
Teacher: Tell me about the history of Tsar Nicholas (blah blah blah).
Student: How should I know, that's his story?
Son: Mom, can I tell you something?
Mom: Yes, of course, honey, what's up?
Son: Ok, you have terrible jokes! They're not even funny!
Mom: Well, I made you.
I would like to tell you the name of a song I showed to my friend who had an overdose of LSD.
I see a dreamer.
How do you get a blonde to drown? You tell them the bottom of the pool smells weird.
I'd tell you a joke about my boyfriend's dick, but it's a private joke.
Can you tell me the real answer to this joke?
What do you call a drone that takes the long way around?
