Tell jokes
What did the lady say when she sat on Pinocchio's face:
"Tell a truth, tell a lie, tell a truth, tell a lie, tell a truth!"
Thanks to the voice who keeps telling me to let go,
he is my only motivation for trying again.
If you're ever bored, punch an orphan. What are they going to do? Tell their parents?
How do you make an emo jump? Tell him to go to the roof.
I tried to tell an Armenian genocide joke in Istanbul.
Nobody got it.
joe mama roast
Troll your friend by saying "I" and saying "cup," and then tell them that that means "I see you pee."
LOL
There is also "lettuce cup," which means "let us see you pee."
When your mom tells you there's a present in the laundry room,
The present: Laundry.
*gunshot*
You know why eggs can't tell jokes?
They crack each other up!
If you kick an orphan, what are they gonna do? Tell their parents on you?
Dad: Johnny, Johnny?
Johnny: Yes, Papa.
Dad: Getting women?
Johnny: Yes, Papa.
Dad: Telling lies?
Johnny: No, Papa.
Dad: Well, you're 100% lying because you get NO WOMEN!
"Jimmy Jimmy, Yes Papa,"
"Give away my Money, No Papa,"
"Telling Lies, OK, Ima Check my Bank Account."
Q: How do you punish a blind person?
A: Give them a gun and tell them it's a hairdryer.
I don't like telling nine eleven jokes, because they always crash and burn.
I got evicted from the hospital today for telling all the patients to stay positive!
What a negative effect!
How can you tell that a blonde likes you? She only gives three fucking nights in a row.
You're walking one day and a little kid, about 5-6 years old, comes up to you asking, "What's a condom?" You have to give that child the wrong answer, what would you tell them? Comment on what you would tell them.
I made an advent calendar for a Jehovah’s Witness.
Behind every door someone tells you to fuck off.
I would like to tell you the name of a song I showed to my friend who had an overdose of LSD.
I see a dreamer.
I was digging and found some gold. I was going to tell my mom, then I remembered why I was digging.
Son: Mom, can I tell you something?
Mom: Yes, of course, honey, what's up?
Son: Ok, you have terrible jokes! They're not even funny!
Mom: Well, I made you.