Tell jokes

Do not tell an orphan family meeting; they wouldn't get it.

I saw your mother get into a white Ford Taurus on the corner of Milton and Halliburton, and you're still trying to tell me she ain't got no job cause she "can't get a ride to work?"

This guy goes to the doctor and says, “I think I’m a wigwam, no, I think I’m a teepee, no, I must be a wigwam, no, a teepee.”

The doctor tells him, “I think I understand your problem. You’re two tents.”

Knock knock.

"Who's there?"

A man with a drum.

"Well, tell him to beat it!"

Tell all the skeleton jokes you want, but I've got thick skin.

I would tell you my jokes about pogs, but they would eventually get too boar-ing.

If you want to punch someone, just punch an orphan. What are they gonna do, tell their parents?

How do you make your girlfriend scream during sex?

Call and tell her about it.

I noticed my friend's hairline yesterday. I could tell it was a Supercuts hair salon haircut, so how I could tell was 'cuz it was super alright, super lame.

How many people fit in a tree?

I don't know, you tell me.

I made an advent calendar for a Jehovah’s Witness.

Behind every door someone tells you to fuck off.

The bell rings, and Ana was about to leave, but the teacher said, "The bell doesn't dismiss you, I do."

The next day, Ana was late, and the teacher asked, "Why are you late?" Ana replied with, "The bell doesn't tell me when I should arrive, I do."

I’d tell you a secret about peanut butter, but you might spread it.

Q: How can you tell if a Western is gay?

A: All the good guys are hung.

You have to tell this to a friend:

There are 30 cows in a field. 20 ate 28 chickens. How many didn't? A: 10

When you tell your mom that she is bad at jokes, then she tells you, "Well, I made you!"

Thanks to the voice who keeps telling me to let go,

he is my only motivation for trying again.

You know why eggs can't tell jokes?

They crack each other up!

If you're ever bored, punch an orphan. What are they going to do? Tell their parents?

I tried to tell an Armenian genocide joke in Istanbul.

Nobody got it.