Stereotype jokes
I like this Russian girl, but she hasn't asked me to hang off a cliff while drinking vodka.
How do you know if an Asian has been in your house?
Your dog's gone.
Your finances are done.
And your floaties.
What do you call a gay drive by?
A fruit roll up.
TASTE THE RAINBOW BITCH!!!
You calling me gay, but the pole is straighter than you.
So, I am an emo dude, so I sit in the back of the class, and I talk to no one.
But one day this dude came up to me and tried to talk to me, so I just ignored him. Then he got really pissed off and said, "I'm gonna kill you." I was like, "You're gonna kill me just because I ignored you? Is your ego that big, wow?" He left. Then the next day he brought his goons with him and said, "Now you're dead." I ignored him again, and he said, "You will pay for this."
So the following day after school I was walking down the street back to my house. Then he and his goons tried to attack me, but then they died, so I kept on walking. I had some rope traps set.
This was the best day of my life.
This is why you never mess with emos. We have ropes everywhere.
What do you call Trump with no spray tan on his hair?
Your next door grumpy old neighbor.
Things said by racist aliens:
"Some of my best friends are Green."
"I just know that Orange guy stole my spaceship."
"You're very pretty for a Purple girl."
"We know you Tentacletians like to rape everyone with your tentacles!"
"Adax Hitao should have finished off you Bluish people."
"You 2-headed people are so stupid!"
"No Slimatians are allowed in this restaurant because of health codes."
"Get the hell out of my store you grigger!"
"The Plu Plux Plum meeting is tonight! Let's burn some spaceships on the Greenies' lawns!"
What’s the worst part of being a pedophile?
Getting the blood out of your clown suit.
Yo mama so stupid, she thought Fruit Ninja was a gay weeaboo!
Me: I will rape you!
Woman: NOOOOOO!!! I AM TOO SCARED TO GET "RAPED"!
Why do women be like this?
What do you call a woman who thinks she can do anything a man can do? Wrong.
How many Germans does it take to change a lightbulb?
One.
How does an Indian open his car?
"Boot, boot!" (in an Indian accent)
The homophobes writing these jokes.
Woman jokes aren't funny, period.
An American goes on a British bus after being in war. He wants to sit down, so he goes to the back of the bus to sit down, but there is an old woman on the seat with her dog in the next one.
The man says, "Will you move your dog?"
The lady says, "Oh, you Americans are always so demanding," and she says to sit somewhere else. He goes through and finds no seats, so now he's at the back again. This time he throws the dog out the window and sits down.
The man in front says, "You Americans always do things wrong. First, you drive on the wrong side of the road, then hold you knife and fork wrong, and you threw the wrong bitch out the window!"
Roses are gay, violets are also gay. If you read, you are gay.
How to become a monkey?
Put a red dot on your forehead.
What's the difference between a dwarf and a Japanese man?
I don't know, you tell me.
Did you hear about the Chinese student?
Me neither.