What do you call a warrior that's going to bed?
A knight knight.
Whenever I go to bed, my wife disappears, but whenever I turn on the lights at night sheβs back in bed
How to get a girl in three steps: Step 1: grab a pillow Step 2: grab a blanket Step 3: keep dreaming
One night I was lying in bed, looking up at the stars. As I lay there, I thought to myself: WHERE'S THE ROOF!
They toss and turn to the sound of Thunder, but I got watermelon to sooth my slumber!
This is a poem my younger sister when she was three, recited to a crowd and I will never forget it. It is very short though.
Good night, sleep tight, wake up bright in the morning light, to do what's right, with all your might.
A cow is at his friend's house for a sleepover party. Sadly, all of the beds are taken. Where does the cow sleep?
On the COWch (couch)
When you turn off all the annoying beeping things in the hospital and everyone starts sleeping better.
Kenny's favourite part of living in his mom's basement is sleeping with the landlady.
I love fire. My friends love it too. When i set them on fire, they run around and scream. They sometimes get so tired they immediately fall asleep forever. Also, they need a shower.
girl: hey. orphan; hi girl; wanna be friends? orphan: sure girl:ok and go ask your parents if we can have a sleep over
Me: Oh man, things are really happening for me! I have so much to do!
Depression: Lie in bed
Me: Hey how are you? Depression: I'm doing fine. We are just looking for a home :3 Insomnia: Mommy can we get a home? Anxiety: Insomnia wait for mommy to finish. Depression: Anyway here is my resume! Me: Okie thank you, Ok... mhmmm.. WOW! Okie this is a nice resume! (Didn't Read it..) Depression: Also I have 2 more friends that want to move in too! Me: Ok and there names? Depression: There names are: PTSD and Trauma! Me: Ok they seem fine (Doesn't know about them) Depression: Okie here is the money (a penny :() Thank you we will call you if we need anything. Me: Ok see you soon! :3 Me now hates my life. :)
Did you know that Americans fall out of both sides of the bed?!?
There was once a man from Peru Who fell asleep in a canoe While dreaming of Venus He played with his penis And awoke with a hand full of goo
What did the mommy cow say to the baby cow?
It is pasture your bed time
Did you make your bed this morning? Wanna unmake it together?
What does Jeff Bezos do before he goes to sleep?
He puts his PJ-Amazon!
i don't know a orphan joke but i bib cyr last night
because i an orphan
Why was everybody so tired on April 1st? Because they just finished a March of 31 days!
