Short jokes
Why don't black people go on cruises? They're not falling for that one again.
Your mama so ugly that even Rick Astley had to give her up.
I used to have confidence issues because of my learning disability.
Until someone told me I put the sexy in dyslexia.
What's a pedophile's favorite cooking ingredient?...... Fresh meat.
What do lesbians do when they have a problem? They finger it out.
Friend: Did your tattoos hurt?
Me: Nah, not really.
Friend: What did they feel like?
Me: 7th grade.
Friend: 😶😶😨😰😰😰😨
If you wanna really know how to get under my skin, give me a razor and maybe we'll talk ;)
Q: What's the difference between LeBron James and a priest?
A: The size of balls they play with.
Who says “white men can't jump?” They certainly did when the twin towers were falling.
Why did Michael Jackson like having little boys round him? He was studying for the priesthood.
I saw a fat dude wearing a shirt that said "guess." I said 215kg, he didn't find it as funny.
Do trees shit?
Well, how else would we get #2 pencils?
Turn the comments into a kindergarten fight.
Nazis have marched in Melbourne. Are you sure Eric Clapton and Carrie Underwood are not touring in Australia?
I've realized that suicide would solve all my problems... if I could just get the right people to try it.
What's the difference between Freddie Mercury and Princess Diana?
Freddie lived long enough to be a Queen.
Abortion clinics are kind of like NAZI gas chambers. Less people come out than go in.
Customer: "Can I get this in a smaller size and a different color?"
Employee: "Ma'am, this is an adoption agency, you can't do that here!"
Friends call me crack miser, whatever I snort. My brain starts to distort! I'll be in court.
I ran over an emo yesterday? I wanted to let him see pitch black.
I threw a lamp at an emo? I tried to lighten up his day.