Stephen Hawking just died. Have they tried rebooting him to factory settings?
Short Jokes
What's in a Michael Jackson hotdog?
A 50-year-old piece of meat.
A 12-year-old bun.
I can't find out where Stephen Hawking is from, I just can't place his accent.
Why do feminists eat so much pussy?
To get the taste of dick out of their mouths.
Does it cycle now, you stupid bitches?
What’s the difference between a Ferrari and ten 6-year-olds?
I don’t have a Ferrari in my garage.
We shouldn't joke about rape, because rape is no laughing matter...
Unless you're being raped by a clown.
He's not really dead, his update failed.
Necrophilia in Alabama is fun for the whole family, even grandma.
What's the difference between you and Jesus? Your parents remember Jesus's birth date.
What do kidnappers and Mickey Mouse have in common? They say, "Come inside, it’s fun inside."
I never wanted to believe that my dad was stealing from his job as a road worker.
But when I got home, all the signs were there.
I decided to visit Saudi Arabia with my girlfriend.
She and I learned they celebrate Pride month by throwing stones.
I was raped by a group of mimes. They did unspeakable things to me.
Guy spills milk on me. I say, "It's okay, we all make mistakes sometimes, but apparently your mom made a big one."
Why are there no good Indian actors? Because all the good ones are trying to get your bank details over the phone.
I asked my girlfriend what she wanted to eat.
She said nothing, so I took her to Africa.
What caused Captain Hook's death?
He accidentally used the wrong hand to wipe his ass.
Did you hear about the cheetah who robbed a bank? He ran away so fast he almost got away with it, but he was spotted.
What starts off fun and ends in bankruptcy?
UNPROTECTED SEX.
You know, most people take rocks for granite... sorry.
