Short jokes

A wild Iceberg appears! Titanic uses ram! It is not very effective. (Titanic sinks.)

I would tell you a milk joke, but it's whey too cheesy!

Lost my virginity to a down syndrome the other day... only cause I wanted my first time to be special.

9 out of 10 Americans are stupid... I'm so glad I'm in the 1%.

I saw a little kid on their bike before. So I ran home to see if it was mine. Mine was still chained up, so we’re good.

Why are dolphins so smart?

Because within three hours they can train a human to stand at the edge of the pool and feed them fish!

What's the difference between you and Jesus? Your parents remember Jesus's birth date.

What's the difference between Tyler and a rooster? A rooster says, "cock-a-doodle-doo," Tyler says, "any cock will do."

I was raped by a group of mimes. They did unspeakable things to me.

When the school shooter is just about to leave your classroom, and you think you're in the clear, but the Down syndrome kid says, "Goodbye."

My dog is pregnant. I'm gonna be a... I don't know?

Ohhh, an owner.

What’s the last thing Tickle Me Elmo receives before leaving the factory?

Two test tickles.

It’s all fun and games at “take your kid to work day” until you realize your dad is a suicide bomber.

When the speedbump in a school zone screams, so you go faster.

My grandad was shocked to learn that lightning can strike in the same place twice.

I'm jealous of my LED lights, 'cause they're hanging from the ceiling and I'm not.

I love murder shows... wish me luck cause I'm kinda hoping to be on one one day.

Stephen Hawking just died. Have they tried rebooting him to factory settings?

What do you call a sophisticated American?

A Canadian.

A skeleton goes sky diving. Doesn't come back in one piece.