Short jokes
What does the man say about his baby sister Lydia? "I hope she electrocutes herself!"
I just busted a nut. A ginger nut.
What’s the difference between Isaac Newton and my Dad?
Isaac Newton didn’t beat me half to death with a pipe wrench.
What's a brother and sister from Alabama's favorite sex position?
The cowgirl.
Everyone, take off your pride flags; it's already a new month.
What is 3 feet tall and sits at the bottom of children's beds?
A: Garry Glitter's boots.
Joe Biden was once president, but he got arrested because he got caught fingering a minor.
What do you call my sister?
Suicidal.
Q: Why can't the orphan buy Robux?
A: He could not use his mother's credit card.
It’s me back at it again.
The earth was flat till they buried yo mama!!!
What did the twin tower say to the other?
"I need to catch this plane."
The towers ordered pepperoni but got plane.
What's the difference between a cop car and a hedgehog?
With a cop car, all the pricks are on the inside.
Y'all, I'm suspended till Wednesday and can't do much cuz I'm on a tablet, not my computer. Tell autterpop I won't be on till Wednesday or after.
Uber driver: .........
Me: .........
Uber driver: .........
Me: 5 stars.
One day my girlfriend and I were just hanging out and she needed to tell our dad that we were going out.
Dear clothing websites, if it's out of stock, DO NOT ADVERTISE IT!
Crimes in 2018: assault, murder.
Crimes in 2020: coughing in public.
What does LMAO mean? Launching Missiles At Orphanages.
What does the receptionist at a sperm bank say as clients leave?
Thanks for coming!