Shit jokes
What's braver than coming out gay? Taking a shit in an elementary school bathroom with those two kids that always mess with you and turn off the lights.
You are getting Cole for Christmas, you shit fuckers.
I think democracy is a scam. I love men and I love you. I love men and I love you. I love my dog. He won't sleep inside and I shitted my pants. I peed my pants. I smell bad. I took a shower and my dog was like, "Oh my god." I was like, "Oh." I was like, "Oh my god," and then I was like, "I shitted again" and he was like, "Bark bark," cause he's a dog. Thanks for listening.
Yo mama so ugly, when Santa saw her, he said, "Ho, ho, hole shit!"
I asked my nan if she wouldn't mind shitting in a bucket when we went camping. She replied, "Why the fuck would I want to sit in a bucket?" So eventually she did, and I took the best shit I have ever had!
A butt saw the toilet and said, "Shit, I'm sick!"
Why do birds fly upside down over Poland?
There's nothing worth shitting on.
You are so ugly Santa goes "ho ho ho holy sh*t."
I'd rate the food in Afghanistan a 9/11. That shit was bomb.
Some girl just walks into my 6th period geography class. The first thing I think is, "Oh shit! It's mini Regina George without titties!"
This shit is weird (as baby girl pees).
Dad: “Trust me, shitting is weirder.”
I don't give two shits about how evil these are. They're funny.
Fancy playing rodeo sex?
"OK then," she said!
Then put your dick in her ass and say it’s not as tight as your sister’s ass and hold on for dear life... real life cow bow boy shit!
What do you get when you mix a redneck and spicy food?
The worst shits you'll ever see!
When the quiet kid lost a game of basketball and reaches into his bag,
other people in the gym: "Oh shit this nigga bout to shoot."
When the husband said "Is your ass so big?" she said "Because I am holding my shit."
When I shit in the toilet, I think that if I shit hard enough, I can see my asshole plug.
Yo mama so stupid that she shit and farted on you, asshole!
What does every arsehole and Tory have in common?
They all produce horrible shit.
What does having sex with a woman and cooking an egg in a skillet have in common?
Both end with a loud annoying sound and a gooey mess to clean the shit up.