Sexuality jokes

Why do vegans like to make their food look and taste like meat?

Same reason lesbians use strap-ons. They still like putting meat in their hole, but they don’t like where real meat comes from.

What is the real reason why men jack off? They just enjoy killing kids.

What's the difference between a priest and a rabbi? A rabbi cuts it off, a priest sucks it off.

What's the difference between a gay rooster and a straight rooster?

Straight rooster says, "Cock-a-doodle-doo."

A gay rooster says, "Any cock will do."

Yo mama's so gay that, after watching Aladdin, she tried to fly on a pride flag!

What do you call a transgender person? Nintendo Switch.

What do you call a virgin lying on a waterbed?

A cherry float.

My gay ass: I want to find Jesus.

Religious mom: FINALLY!

Me: Grabs a noose.

Why can't an orphan be gay? It has no one to call daddy.

My cousin said being gay was such a pain in the ass and I asked him why and I said, "Cuz you get buttfucked?" and he said, "No, I get made fun of." and I said, "Why? Cuz you get buttfucked?" and he said, "No, turd." Then I said, "Wow, at least I'm not the one with real pains in my ass, bro."

Don't you just hate it when your grandmas always complaining about things getting stuck between her false teeth, like my foreskin?

"Lemme clap your girl's booty cheeks, daddy papi."

What does a Rubik's cube and a man's penis have in common?

The more you play with it, the harder it gets.

What is the difference between a microwave and a gay guy?

A microwave doesn’t brown your meat.

I think one of my dads might be gay.

Q: Why was the gay man fired from the sperm bank?

A: He got caught drinking on the job.

The good thing about being gay in school is that you can be the best student and still get all the D's.

Why's it so hard to come out of the closet? Just open the door!

What does a lesbian and a sea turtle have in common?

They both choke on plastic.

Robin's gay.