Sexuality

Sexuality Jokes

Rubber

What do bungee jumping and a gay man have in common?

If the rubber breaks, they're in beep shit.

Money

My husband told me he just came into a lot of money.

Weird, he usually uses a sock.

Nun

Did you hear about the nun that got kicked out of the convent?

She got caught squatting on the cucumbers in the garden.

Nun

Did you hear about the nun that got kicked out of the convent?

She got caught squatting on the cucumbers in the garden.

Shit

I'm not into scatplay. In fact, I think that shit's disgusting.

Lesbian

Did you hear about the lesbians who are suing their contractor?

He used nails when they wanted tongue and groove.

Hot Dog

How do you know when you have been invited to a gay barbecue?

When you are unable to distinguish foot-long hot dogs from long and thick big dicks, regardless of skin color.

Gay Man

How do you stop all homophobic heterosexual white men from using all public men's restrooms at a rest area?

Make sure that all public men's restrooms at the rest area are always occupied with gay men that have long and thick big cocks, regardless of skin color.

Lesbian

Do you know the number one cause of death for lesbians?

Getting your fingers stuck in there.

Nun

What is the difference between a nun and a prostitute?

One serves the nailed to the cross, one nailed by her boss.

Nun

What is the difference between a nun and a prostitute?

One says, "God is my father." The other says, "Who's the father and who is my son?"

Nun

What is the difference between a nun and a prostitute?

One is for Sunday morning, and one is for Sunday night.

Special needs

The best news about a pretty girl with special needs is that you can get her to do exactly what you want her to do.

I mean, she probably thinks receiving oral is like 100% blood sausage coming right at her.

Virgin

Comic: God, you're a fuckin' virgin, aren't you?!

Gerald: No! I've been 'round the block loads of times; women practically drool over me.

Comic: Yeah, and the Archbishop of Banterbury, mate. A name like Gerald, and with added 'four eyes' like them shit pair of glasses from FOUR EYED SPECCY INSTITUTION, mate, the only woman your dick has been in was when you were inside your mom's womb.

Marriage License

If a man and a woman need a marriage license to get married, does a lesbian couple need a liquor license to get married?