Plastic

Plastic Jokes

Turtle

What do turtles and lesbians have in common? They both choke on plastic.

Lego

When the Lego box says 6-99 years but you eat it in 20 minutes.

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  • Michael Jackson

    What did they do with Michael Jackson when he died?

    He got so many plastic surgeries that they melted him down into legos and let kids play with him for a change.

    Song

    Radiohead had to remake "Fake Plastic Trees" after encountering Carrie Underwood in real life for the first time.

    Michael Jackson

    What's the difference between Michael Jackson and a shopping bag?

    One is made of plastic and bad for kids; the other one holds shopping.

    Turtle

    What do turtles and lesbians have in common?

    They both choke on plastic.

    China

    China is as fake as bitches with plastic surgery, and they talk about body positivity.

    Lego

    What did they do with Michael Jackson when he died?

    They melted him down and turned him into Lego, so kids could play with him for once.

    Michael Jackson

    What do Michael Jackson and Tesco carrier bags have in common? They’re both made out of plastic and harmful to children.

    Pristiano Penaldo

    I was exploring the Dubai trophy factory when someone came crashing in. It was him, Pristiano Penaldo. He held the workers at gunpoint, forcing them to make him another plastic Mickey Mouse award or he will dive and sue them for assaulting him. Shame on you, pendu!

    Michael Jackson

    What's the difference between Michael Jackson and a grocery bag?

    One's plastic and dangerous to play with; the other is to carry groceries.

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  • Michael Jackson

    Why do kids like Michael Jackson so much?

    Because he's made out of plastic, and that's what toys are made out of! 😂

    Toy

    Little Johnny sits on a chair. He notices he is sitting on something. Then he sees a plastic di**. He asks his mom, "What's that?" and Mom didn't know, so when his dad comes home from work, he sees him with the plastic di** and says, "Son, why you messing with my personal toy?"

    Condom

    I went to the pharmacy the other day. I tried to buy a pack of condoms, but I pretended I didn't have enough money to mess with the cashier.

    I went back into the aisles of the store, got a pack of rubber bands and plastic wrap, bought them, and walked out. I loved the look on the cashier's face when they saw my decision.

    Michael Jackson

    What does Michael Jackson and a Playstation have in common?

    They're both made of plastic and children turn them on.