Say jokes
An emo kid sees his clothes hanging to dry, and he says to his clothes, "I wish I were you!"
A cop pulls me over and asks if I have been drinking.
I'm an honest person and say yes, I did, so I take off my sunglasses and tell him that I now had 2 glasses less.
What did the priest say during the christening?
"So anyway, I started blasting!"
How to know something won’t be fun:
Someone will say, "C'mon, it’ll be fun!"
Wife: [Looks] in the mirror. Wife: I look fat, can you say something positive? Husband: At least your eyes work.
Memes
What did the Turkey say to the other Turkey?
"They forgot the stuffing!"
What did the fat guy say to the tree?
"Get me some coconuts!"
How to harass? Say it out loud but slowly. Split that word into, and it sounds like "her ass."
Your mom's so fat, when she stands on the scale, it says, "To be continued..."
Şehmus ne demiş? Ne bileyim, olm, ona sor.
Why do-- wait, what am I saying? What am I talking about?
What does the cent say when it says hello? It waves.
My mom told me to go to bed, but then I grabbed a drink and went in their room to say goodnight, and they looked like Adam and Eve on steroids!
What did the Mexican say when a house landed on him?
Esé said, “Get off me, homes!”
You know they say, when you get lemons make lemonade... Well, I took that a little bit too literal.
Turns out squeezing your wife's tits as hard as you can hurts them.
But at least lemonade came out!
What did the shirt say to the pants?
Belt.
What did the plane say to the towers: "Can't go over it, can't go under it, oh no, we got to go through it."
I know this isn't an orphan joke, but I didn't know where to say it, so yeah.
I threw a nut at the allergy table and screamed, "YES, TRIPLE KILL!"
What did MLK Jr. say when he spent the night on the internet?
"Last night I had a meme."
You go h dichotomy lol what do you want to what what’s the name for the address for sure what’s what I name it says I name it lol I don’t o I have to get r CB n nu set set e Okay okay I’ll be at my place.