Say jokes
A guy is sitting at home when he hears a knock at the door. He opens the door and sees a snail on the porch. He picks up the snail and throws it as far as he can.
Three years later there’s a knock on the door. He opens it and sees the same snail. The snail says: “What the hell was that all about?”
I didn’t orphan never say home.
Because they didn’t have one.
5 knock knock jokes from best to corny.
1. Knock! Knock! Who's there? Needle. Needle who? Needle little help getting in the door.
2. Knock! Knock! Who's there? Scold. Scold who? Scold outside, let me in!
3. Knock! Knock! Who's there? Mikey. Mikey who? Mikey isn't working, can you let me in?
4. Knock! Knock! Who's there? Says. Says who? Says me, that's who!
5. Knock! Knock! Who's there? Voodoo. Voodoo who? Voodoo you think you are, asking all these questions?
What did the orphan say when his mum asked, "What do you want for dinner?"
He replied, " "
Kid says, “Are you a soldier?”
Soldier says, “Mhm.”
Kid says, “I wanna be a soldier someday.”
Soldier says, “Really?”
The kid says, “Yeah, but father says I don’t have the balls to be a soldier, but he’s right. I’m a FUCKING PRETTY PRETTY PRINCESS!!!"
Summary of Twilight in one sentence:
Bella hits on two guys, runs away. Edward glances to Jacob saying, "Go Fetch," and suddenly Bella's his.
What time is it when you say "bad day?"
Jesus walks into a hotel, hands the inn keeper three nails and says, "Can ya put me up for the night?"
What's the worst thing to say at a live birth?
"Hi guys, welcome to my unboxing video!"
A priest asks a nun if she has slept with anyone, and the nun says, "Yes, a fucking hot girl!"
What did the parent say to M.J.?
"Get off my kid!"
Can you really wheel my real wheelchair?
Try saying that over and over fast. Bit of a tongue twister.
When the teacher says she'll call your parents but you're an orphan.
What did the one tower say to the other?
"Here comes the airplane!"
What did the neutron say to the atom?
"Sandwiches, dude!"
What did the gay sperm say to the other gay sperm?
"Why is there so much shit in here?"
A sibling went up to their other sibling and said, "Dad said you're adopted."
The other sibling said, "You are, too."
Then the first sibling goes, "No, I'm not."
And the sibling says, "We're twins."
The other kid goes, "And you're adopted... oh."
Why are hindustan bhai so good at Python?
When they are hungry, they use Python and take credit card information ;). You know what they say, you give a man a curry and he eats for a day, you give a man a language and he eats for a lifetime.
"Hey, Prince, I want to say, "Don't die, I love you!"
Do you know the phrase "One man's trash is another man's treasure"? Wonderful saying, horrible way to find out that you were adopted!