Why are all women's feet small? So they can stand closer to the stove.
Women be like don't tell me what to wear, proceeds to tell men what to wear.
In case there's a school shooting, the teachers can help out and shoot the kids.
I once auditioned to be in Sausage Party. I thought I filled the role well.
To start, I'm a big fella in size.
I saw a skinny guy act like Santa, so I went over to him. "You can't pull that off," I said. He said, "Then you try it." He gave me the Santa suit, and I dressed up. He walked by and saw me with 45 kids in line to sit on my lap and tell me what they wanted for Christmas.
A man who thinks he's funny but is actually a transvestite/transformer.
I hate when my father doesn't cook me cocktails for tea.
Hailey: "Hey Brayden!"
Brayden: "Hey!"
*Music roles around*
*I tell Brayden Hailey likes him*
Brayden: "O_O"
Hailey: *Hides*
So sad </3 xD
Did you know Paul Walker was a method actor? He took his role very seriously as a human torch.
Stephen Hawking is just in a role play. He died to a crash in Minecraft.
Not many people know this, but Soulja Boy was the lead role in a very successful children's movie a while ago. Released to theaters nationwide in 2006 was Honey, I Crunked the Kids.
Why do orphans love role-plays?
Because they can call someone "daddy."
Ya make 10 paintings, you aren't an artist.
Ya make 20 meals, you aren't a chef.
But when I kill ONE PERSON, I'm a "horrible person" and a "menace to society."
Director: Hi, we are making a huge cliffhanger in this movie.
Actor: Really? What do I do?
Director: You will play the part of the cliff. (holds up hanging rope)
What did the man say to his wife? "Make me a damn sandwich, woman!"
John Wilkes Booth, to his fiancee: "I have an important role to play tonight at Ford's Theater."
Fiancee: "Break a leg!"
Women are only for sex!
They are good for cooking and sex!
Nothing but those things.
Why can't an orphan role-play Star Wars?
Because they have no one to play Darth Vader.
What do an acting role and playing sports have in common?
If you break a leg, you get cast.
If I could be any creature, I would be a Unicorn because they are Beautiful, Majestic, Sparkly, Bright, Gods. They create Joy and Happiness everywhere they go.
Unicorns made my life better when I got to know them more. ^-^ They filled my life with more Happiness. I believe in the Unicorns, and they'll believe in me. I am not a Unicorn, although I am the Princess of the Unicorn Land, but if I could be any creature, I would be a Unicorn! :P
