Movie Jokes

Punk

I love how in horror movies the person calls out, “Hello,” as if the psycho will answer, “Hey, what’s up, I’m in the kitchen. Want a sandwich?”

Anonymous
in Puns

why does a movie set say break a leg? because they have a CAST

Anonymous
in Puns

There’s a movie about constipation. It hasn’t come out yet.

Safris
in Orphan

What’s a orphans favorite movie

Home alone

Jstrong:)
in Titanic

My grandfather was there when the titanic sank…he shouted 3 times that it was gonna sink until they Finally kicked him out of the movie theater…haha

0
ur mama, oh wait...
in Orphan

what movie does an orphan want for Christmas, spiderman homecoming ;)

Anonymous
in Star Wars

Why did the Star Wars movies come out in the sequence 4, 5, 6, 1, 2, 3? – Because in charge of sequence, Yoda was.

4
Anonymous
in Orphan

What’s an orphan’s favorite spiderman movie?

Spiderman No Way Home

Anonymous
in Chuck Norris

If Chuck Norris was a Spartan in the Movie 300, the movie would be called 1.

Ur MoM;)
in Orphan

Why do orphans become criminals? To know what it’s like to be Wanted.

Why are orphans bad at poker? They don’t know what a full house is.

I saw a child crying yesterday so I asked him where his parents were. Bad move. I got fired from my job at the orphanage.

What do you call an orphan’s family reunion? Me time.

Did you know? The letter ‘f’ in orphan stands for family.

What is an orphan’s least favorite song? We are Family.

What’s an orphan’s least favorite tv show? Family Guy.

What’s an orphan’s least favorite movie? Meet the Parents.

What’s an orphan’s least favorite type of music? House.

Next: Inappropriate Jokes

What’s an orphan’s least favorite store? Home Depot.

What’s an orphan’s favorite band? Foster the People.

What do you call a virgin from Alabama? An orphan.

Where do orphan chickens end up? Foster Farms

What beer do orphans drink? Foster’s.

Why do orphans have water with their cereal? Because their dad never came back with the milk.

What do you call a fish with no parents? An orfin

Why do orphans like playing tennis? Because it’s the only love they get.

Me: Are you an orphan? Orphan: Yes, what gave me away? Me: Your parents.

demon queen
in Horror

horror movies don’t scare me. 5 missed calls from my mum scares me.

Anonymous

I don’t understand why in horror movies they make digging a grave look so easy, It usually takes me days

no1
in Common

Q: What does Abraham Lincoln have in common with a poor quality pirated movie?

A: They were both shot in a theater.

deez
in Orphan

what’s an orphans favorite movie?

Spider-Man No Way Home >:D

Anonymous

Have you heard about the movie constipation?

No,Because It never came out…

Orphan
in Orphan

What is an orphan’s least favorite movie

Spider-Man, Because it told them there was no way home

klondykehomophobe

“Hotel Rwanda” has a high score on Rotten Tomatoes. But their Yelp reviews are terrible.

Anonymous
in Alphabet

So there was a kid named Bobby, and he was writing notes. He asked his mother, who was on a phone call, what is one plus one? She said I HATE YOU. Then he asked his brother what is 2 + 2, who was watching a Batman movie, said, NU NU NU NU NU NU NU NU NU NU BATMAN! Then he asked his dad what is 4 plus 4, who was playing football, said 85 SMACK EM DOWN! Then he asked his sister 8+8, (she was playing with barbies), and she said, My buns are burning. Then he went to school and told her teacher the first note he wrote down. The teacher sent him to the principal’s office. The principal yelled, WHO DO YOU THINK YOU ARE?! Bobby said, NU NU NU NU NU NU NU NU NU NU BATMAN! The principal yelled, HOW MANY SPANKINGS DO YOU WANT?! Then he said, 85 SMACK EM DOWN! Then he walked away from the principal’s office and said, my buns are burning.

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Anonymous
in Orphan

if a orphan was spiderman which movie would he be in

No way home

Anonymous
in Offensive

What is Steven hawking’s least favorite movie? Standing tall