Theater jokes
Q: Why did the ballerina get kicked off the stage at the performance?
She was standing way too close to the dancers.
Not many people know this, but Soulja Boy was the lead role in a very successful children's movie a while ago. Released to theaters nationwide in 2006 was Honey, I Crunked the Kids.
Who else liked the part in Morbius when he said his catchphrase "IT'S MORBIN' TIME" and MORBED over everyone? In my theater we had a standing ovation!
Why can't orphans go to movies?
There PG-13 movies.
Shrek once went to the movies and when he sat down he felt this slimy and sticky feeling on the chair, so he stood up and complained about his chair being dirty... until he realized that he forgot to wipe earlier... so he stopped complaining and went back to his chair and sat back down.
Joe mama's so hairy when she went to the movie theater, the people thought she was Chewbacca!
Why did the actor fall through the floor?
He was just going through a stage!
People were deciding how to punish a terrible criminal, and one man came up with a great idea.
He sat him in a movie theater with no food at all and made him watch a 12 hour documentary about the country Hungary.
Why are theaters popular among cows?
They enjoy watching moovies.
What do orphans and olden day actors have in common?
Both get food thrown at them some of the time.
Yo ass so fat that you can't see your toes.
When you go to the movies, you take up seven rows.
I caught my girlfriend cheating on me. I was sitting in the back of the movie theater, where no one was. Suddenly, she was sitting in front of me with some guy she was hugging. I was furious. I couldn't stay there anymore, so her friend and I had to finish it in the toilet.
What's the king of all school supplies? A ruler.
What's a flower's favorite drink at the movie theater? Root Beer.
What's a cow's favorite place to go during his free time? The Moooovies.
What do you call a terrorist at a cinema?
A box office bomb.
Why did the skeleton go to the movies by himself?
He had no body to go with.
Why do we tell actors to break a leg?
Because every show has a cast. Get it, LOL?
Yo mama's so fat, she works in the movie theater as a screen.
What's the difference between a magician and a chorus line?
The magician has a cunning array of stunts!
Two girls are at a play and are about to go on the stage.
Ally before the other girl goes on stage: Break a leg!
Rachel: Alright!
On stage, Rachel trips over a stand and breaks her leg.
Rachel calling backstage: I broke my leg!
Director: Hi, we are making a huge cliffhanger in this movie.
Actor: Really? What do I do?
Director: You will play the part of the cliff. (holds up hanging rope)