Theater

Theater Jokes

Actor

They told me I could never be an actor.

No one suspected me when they went missing the next day.

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  • Titanic

    My grandfather was there when the Titanic sank. He shouted 3 times that it was gonna sink until they finally kicked him out of the movie theater... haha

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  • Phone

    Why are there no good Indian actors? Because all the good ones are trying to get your bank details over the phone.

    Cast

    Why does a movie set say "break a leg"? Because they have a cast.

    Titanic

    My grandpa kept warning the people on the Titanic that the boat was going to sink. Result: he got kicked out of the movie theater.

    Cow

    What did the cow and bull do for their first date? - Dinner and a Moovie.

    Teacher

    I love telling stories as theatrical plays. When we had a free dress day near Christmas, my teacher dressed up as a reindeer, so I got my teacher involved... and shot her.

    Abraham Lincoln

    Q: What does Abraham Lincoln have in common with a poor quality pirated movie?

    A: They were both shot in a theater.

    Moth

    Why did the moth nibble a hole in the carpet?

    He wanted to see a floor show.

    Movie

    I’d like to take you to the movies, but unfortunately, they don’t let you bring your own snacks.

    Cow

    Where do cows go to see the big screen? The mooo-vie theater.

    Yo mama

    Yo mama so fat when she went to the movie theater, she sits next to everyone.

    Cow

    What’s the point in a cow going to the cinema? To be a-moo-sed!

    Orphan

    Why didn’t the orphan see the new movie?

    It was "Spider-Man: No Way Home."

    Mama

    Yo mama's so fat, she works in the movie theater as a screen.