Will de lad

I once tried to have a family friendly conversation with a worm, but it kept its head in the dirt

I once went to the bank with some raisins because I wanted to set up a current account

Kids, next time you have school dinners, make sure you have something you actually like so you don't have to shove all your food over to one side of the plate to make it look like you've eaten more than you actually have.

I once went to the bar for a pint, but the strippers their didn't have that much breast milk.

I once auditioned to be in sausage party. I thought I filled the role well.

I like men like I like money, always getting lost under my bed.

I once did an exam on rainbows. I passed with flying colours.

katie Price's answer for everything is darkness. She isn't a dull person, but playing eye spy with my little eye with Harvey is just way too easy.

My parents told me that when they had sex, it was absolutely shambles. Thankfully, it turned out that they were real balls.

Miss Stephen likes sex like she likes kids. On a desk in pure isolation.

Miss Stephen likes kids like she likes wine. 15 years and in isolation.

why did miss stephen get divorced? she didn't float too

diabetic wives are like cillit bang. squeeze them a bit and bang! the bed is gone

Losing weight is a piece of cake. Just don't pick it up.