You're so hot when your girlfriend tries to suck your cock, it burns her mouth.
Relationship Jokes
What do lovely men and tampons have in common?
Both lick up the juices of the women they were made for.
Prostitutes remind me of chewese.
If Selena Gomez wasn't really single after Justin Bieber dumped her, I would wait for her to come by my house, take her fine ass in my room, close my door, and give her some sex medicine until she masturbates.
Did you know that "girlfriend" at the end, it starts with "end." So does "boyfriend," and "friend" have "end" at the end of it, but "family" at the end it "ily" I love you.
What did the man say to his wife, wanna play?
What do a blackjack dealer and my uncle have in common?
They both hit me face down on the table.
When you end up pregnant...
Mom told me if a boy touched my breast I should say "DON'T," and if he touched me down there I should say "STOP." But Dad, he touched me both places at once so I said, "DON'T STOP! DON'T STOP!" π
I said to my wife that she's so ugly that she threw a boomerang and it never came back.
Runescape is the only form of birth control that is 100% effective.
Max Alexander Heart is adopted.
I love my family when they're buried alive.
His wife shut off the internet.
What did the boyfriend say to his girlfriend?
Why does the sun get a lot of girls? Because it's hot.
Roses are red, My friend is choking. That stupid bitch shouldn't have eaten my muffin.
Evan David Sandri is gay and he is adopted.
Why did the pillow cross the road?
Because his cousin's name was Koshin, and he didn't want to live anymore.
I have a trans friend.
He is in a polyamorous relationship and would be straight if they had a dick.
My girlfriend called me a pedophile... That's a big word for a 1st grader.