My boyfriend told me to stop acting like a flamingo. So I had to put my foot down.
My boyfriend came over today and stole my milk. How dairy.
A blind woman tells her boyfriend that she’s seeing someone. It’s either really terrible news or really great news.
My boyfriend just broke up with me for talking about video games too much. What a stupid thing to Fallout 4.
What do you call you're daughter's boyfriend when he brings her back past 10pm?
An ambulance
Girlfriend: am I pretty or ugly?
Boyfriend: your both!
Girlfriend: what do you mean by that?
Boyfriend: your pretty ugly!!!
My ex boyfriend's dick is so small that instead of giving him a handjob I had to give him a thumb and forefinger job.
I got mad at my sister's boyfriend so I fucked his girl
Feel my shirt...it's boyfriend material
A hill billy female has to decide if she would save her brother or her boyfriend. She chose both because her brother is her boyfriend.
My ex boyfriend tried to scan himself at the supermarket check out for fun.
“See how I can’t scan myself? It’s because I’m priceless”
I decided I’d scan my wrist too, just for fun.
Found out I’m worth $3.97
A girl and boy are in bed after sex. The boy goes “I can’t believe they got together after all that shit” girl says “who” boy goes “ my ass cheeks”
why was Helen kellers belly button bruised? her boyfriend was blind too.
On a scale of 1-10, how old was Michael Jackson’s last boyfriend?
Why won't my boyfriend eat my pie? His brother made it.
So a girl says to her ex I can't get you out of my mind the boyfriend I knew you we've the girl replies I see you in everything like when I'm walking down the street even at work like trash cans are everywhere
My bff asked me: "You know why it took Carlos 3 days to move on?" I said: "Why?" My bff says: "Well its because he was already cheating." I said: "KNEW IT!"
I was watching my boyfriends dog while he took a shower. I started playing fetch with the him when the ball went over the balcony. He went to get it and fell 10 stories. When i looked down, he appeared to be dead. My boyfriend loved his dog and I didn't know what to do ,so feeling awful, I sat on the couch and waiting for him to come back. About three minutes later he got out of the shower. He ordered some food and went to the table to eat when I said ,”you know , your dogs been a little depressed lately...”
like if you have a boyfriend girlfriend or husband or wife or a crush.
I guess age is just a number but in your boyfriends case a personal preference.
