Relationship jokes

My grandma said, "Hey, you want a Butterfinger cause I do?"

Me: Grandpa's in the kitchen if you want a finger.

Why did you and Sarah break up?

'Cause she cheetahed on me.

Are your forehead and your hairline best friends because they look like they go way back?

Do you know the phrase "One man's trash is another man's treasure?"

That's a horrible thing to find out when you're adopted.

This is not a joke, Tom. I'm asking you to leave me alone, stop being sexual, I don't like you.

Your mom was dating a boy that had a twin brother, but she did it with the wrong one.

What do you call an orphan taking a selfie?

A family portrait.

Your hairline [is] so bad even your mama left you.

Why did the orphan cheat on his girlfriend with a guy?

Because he wanted someone to call "Mommy" and "Daddy."

Why do people play soccer?

Because people need to kick harder to win a parent.

Mummy, how was I born?

Mummy replied, "Well, your father and I got married, and soon I became fat and you came out, and then in, out, in, out, and after you did that a million times, you were born."

My love for you is like poop.

Whenever I feel you, I have to run to the toilet and flush you away.

Why can't orphans be gay?

They have nobody to call "daddy."

I hate adopted kids. They are ugly and stupid, lmao.

I bet your hairline goes inside your private part, and your girlfriend can’t even touch it.

My mate Noha.

My mom went to take out the trash, but I couldn't find you.

What’s it called when an orphan takes a photo?

A family picture.

Luke asks his friend, "How old is your father?"

James replied, "He's as old as me."

Luke then said, "It doesn't make any sense."

James then said, "He became my father when I was born."

I suck Cyrus's dick when he is sleeping.