Calculator jokes
I don't like calculator jokes because they are too overused.
Bobby had 54 dicks (54).
He took 33 pills a month (5433).
Once he ran out of pills, he was left with 45 dicks (543345).
(Flip the calculator once you got the full number. 543345! He's got a lot!
Here’s a trick I learned to do on the calculator.
Sally had 69 boobs (69) which was too too too many (69222), so she went to the doctor on 51st street (6922251), and he said to take a certain pill 8 times a day (6922251 times 8), which left her (flip your calculator over)
Boobless.
Trust your calculator. It's something to count on.
The boobs was funny tbh... But the last was rude.
"I had a great day today." "Why?" "Because Allison was frustrated at her calculator and started banging it on the side of the table and the teacher screamed, 'Allison how would you like it if I banged you on the table?'"
How do you count cows? -- With a cowculator.
A girl tried 77.34 (77.34) times to think of a word opposite of BYE. Then her brother divided the word BYE. 77.34 divided by 100. TRY IT!!
There was 1 gay guy, who kissed 4576 gay guys. Then had sex with them, creaming so hard, all of the dicks cumming on his face.
Then he stopped and had sex again x6, now he was left with...
Your Momma's so fat, the recursive function calculating her mass causes a stack overflow.
How do you say goodbye to a calculus teacher?
Calculator!
What did the calculator say to the student?
You can always count on me.
Which book takes an extreme turn and has an incredible plot twist?
- The math book. Suddenly letters appear in the calculations...
59009 flip it backwards on your calculator... it = boobs!
Laila has 69 boobs, but that is 222 too many. One day, she went on 51st Street to meet Dr. X, who ate all her boobs, and now she's boobless :)
6922251 x 8 = 55378008. Put the calculator upside down.
I was going to buy a pocket calculator. But then I thought, who cares how many pockets I have?
You should wear binoculars when calculating. It helps divide.
- Got myself a bathroom scale so now I know exactly how much I poop.
- Right. So you weigh yourself before and after you poop and calculate the difference? That’s cool.
- Oh...that might actually be even easier.
How do trees calculate square roots? They use log-arithms.
There was one girl. She met 5000 guys. She had sex with each of them seven times. She became... - flip screen (=).