“I had a great day today.” “Why?” “Because Allison was frustrated at her calculator and started banging it on the side of the table and the teacher screamed, ‘Allison how would you like it if I banged you on the table?’”
How do you count cows? – With a cowculator.
Trust your calculator. It’s something to count on.
How do you say goodbye to a calculus teacher?
Here’s a trick I learned to do on the calculator
Sally had 69 boobs (69) which was too too too many (69222) so she went to the the doctor on 51st street (6922251) and he said to take a certain pill 8 times a day (6922251 times 8), which left her (flip your calculator over)
I was going to buy a pocket calculator. But then I thought, who cares how many pockets I have.
What did the calculator say to the student? You can always count on me.
How do trees calculate square roots. They use log-arithms.
- Got myself a bathroom scale so now I know exactly how much I poop
- Right. So you weight yourself before and after you poop and calculate the difference? That’s cool.
- Oh…that might actually be even easier
I Don’t like calculator jokes cause thay are to overused
Your Momma’s so fat, the recursive function calculating her mass causes a stack overflow.
walks into a comedy night club Owner: You’re doing standup tonight right?* Noob Joker (you): Yes I am! Owner: Get onto the stage Me: walks up stage Owner: this is the standup comedian noobpro Me: HEY GUYS HOW ABOUT SOME DONALD TRUMP Crowd: RUNS
a girl tried 77.34 (77.34) times to think of a word oppisite word of BYE.then her brother divided the word BYE. 77.34 divided by 100. TRY IT!!
There was (1) girl. She met (+5000) guys. She had sex with each of them (x7). She became… - flip screen (=).
Little Jimmy has 5 red apples. His dad’s car will arrive in 20 minutes. Calculate the mass of the Sun
I remember having a crush on my math teacher so i winked at her and said “dont worry babe, ill callculater.”
The boobs was funny tbh… But the last was rude
666 + 420 + 911 + 21 = ?
Do it in calculator
Flip 1134 over on a calculator.