What would you do after seeing your most loved one shot? Reload.
Relationship Jokes
"You’re the milk to my cookies."
Kaleb: Addison, are you okay???
Addison: Not at all. People think I'm annoying and stupid! Do you?
Kaleb: Yes, once I pound you in the ass.
I have 25 friends from the alphabet, but don't ask me why.
There was once a small earthquake, but when I got outside, I realized my brother was still stuck inside. When I told my mom, she just said, "It doesn't matter, you're my favorite anyway!"
You know I really love going to school and meeting my crush.
All I have to do is go to the Africa section.
What's the difference between you, your uncle, and your dad?
One didn't go in the closet.
A sister went to her brother's room and says,
"I'm scared, can I sleep with you?"
"Yes, sis."
"What is this?" (pointing at his dick)
"My pet snake."
"Can I pet it?"
"Yes."
He wakes up in a hospital.
"What happened?"
"Your snake spit on me, so I bit his head off."
"You dummy!"
"Whaaat?"
Why did my mouth say no to butt? Because that would be too much sex.
Why can’t orphans be gay?
They have no one to call "daddy."
61, 62, 63, 64, 65, 66, 67, 68, 69... mouthwash.
How to make the kissing in a tree recognizable: me and you k.i.s.s.i.n.g., tree sitting, wedding, love, then comes love, then comes baby in the carriage, then hate comes, divorce and purse.
FEW!!!!!!!
"Hey, tie your shoes! I don’t want you falling for anyone else."
What can't a sniper say to his wife?
"I missed you."
Gina: Ha! YOU HAVE NOTHING!
Orphan: Yes I do.
Gina: What do you have then?
Orphan: Parents.
Gina: LIAR!
Having sex with three people is a threesome.
Having sex with four people is a foursome.
Then maybe I am handsome after all...
You're adopted.
My grandfather told me I'm too reliant on technology. I called him a hypocrite and unplugged his life support.
Son: Dad, how was I born?
Dad: Your mum's a hoe.
Son: OK, what's a hoe?
Dad: Your mum.
Did you know that your son has been deeper inside of your wife than you have...unless you put the coat hanger up there?
