“I hate going to weddings, because the old lady next to you always whispers in your ear, ‘You’re next.’ So I started doing the same to them at funerals, ‘You’re next.’”

I hate how funerals are always at 9 a.m. – I’m not really a mourning person.

Someone told me that you can let out all your anger by writing letters about everyone you hate and then burning them…

But I was just wondering… should I keep the letters?

why do orphans hate going to costco because they need a parent to get samples

You wanna know why I hate circles so much? They’re just so pointless! But I guess that’s how they roll

I hate 2 faced people because I don’t know which face to slap first.

Why do the japanese hate Christmas???

Becasue the last time a Fat Man came down the chimney, they lost half their population

I hate these double standards.

if you burn a body at a crematorium you’re "doing a good job" if you do it at home you’re “destroying evidence”

A black boy walks into the kitchen where his mother is baking and accidentally pulls the flour over onto his head. He turns to his mother and says, “Look Mama, I’m a white boy!” His mother smacks him and says, “Go tell your Daddy what you just said!” The boy finds his father and says, “Look Daddy, I’m a white boy!” His Daddy bends him over, spanks him, stands the boy back up, and says, “Now, what do you have to say for yourself?” The boy replies, “I’ve only been a white boy for five minutes and I already hate you black people!”

I really hate waiting to die… Its taking a lifetime

Me: Happy birthday! I got you a Rubix cube! Friend: I hate you. Me: why? Friend: I’m color blind

i hate when i lose my white friends in the snow and my black friends in the dark. where do i lose my friends from Afghanistan? in an explosion

Why do Native Americans hate snow?

Because it’s white and settles on their land.

Why doesn’t my egg wants to crack? Because I hate my egg-sistence.

What do skeletons hate the most about wind? Nothing, it goes right through them.

What show does an orphan hate?

Family Guy.

I’m not saying I hate you. But if you got hit by a bus I’d be driving that bus.

It’s ironic that the more other people love you the more you hate yourself.

i hate myself

What song do orphans hate the most?“we are family”.