Perception jokes
What do you call someone who points out the obvious? Someone who points out the obvious.
What is always moving but we never see it walk?
Time! Hahahaha!
Why can't the blind man see? Because he can't see.
Women only call me ugly until they find out how much money I make. Then they call me ugly and poor.
What do you call Helen Keller in a pitch black, sound proof room?
Unnecessary.
I have 3 eyes, 2 ears, and 6 mouths, what am I?
UGLY!
I spy with my little eye nothing because I only have two normal-sized eyes.
Why can't blind people eat fish?
Because it's sea food.
I've just started reading my first ever Braille horror story, and I think that something scary is about to happen. I can feel it.
Look in a mirror.
I just found out I'm colorblind. It came out of the yellow.
I have just started a sexual relationship with a blind woman. It's very rewarding, but quite challenging.
Took me ages to get her husband's voice right.
You can tell a lot about a woman from her ankles. If they are on your shoulders, she probably likes you.
If I had a dollar for every girl that found me unattractive, they would eventually find me attractive.
Your mom finds a mirror on the scrapyard and says, "I would have thrown away a picture like that, too!"
Wife: "I look fat. Can you give me a compliment?"
Husband: "You have perfect eyesight."
A blind man once told me he smokes a lot because he has nothing to look forward to. Well, let's just say that I see his point.
So a blind man walks into a bar.
At least he thinks so.