Perception jokes
Yo mama so stupid that when the mirror cracked, she tried to order another one.
I once was sitting outside and watched the birds go by. I checked my watch and said, "My, how time is FLYING by!"
Look in the mirror. There's a joke for you.
You want to know what the ugly truth looks like?
Go look in the mirror.
Hellen Keller once said, "love is not something you see or hear, it is something you feel," but of course she said it like this "fbfebsovbforbw urbwbwvorb."
You are the joke.
Did you know Helen Keller had a dog? Neither did she.
A knife is like hallucinations, both in your head.
Yo mama's so short, when it rains, she's the last to know!
A blind man walks into a bar and asks the bartender, "Wanna hear a blonde joke?" The bartender replies with, "I'm blonde, the man working next to me is blonde, the woman next to you is blonde, and the fat guy behind you is blonde." Then says, "Do you really wanna tell the blonde joke?" The blind guy responds with, "No, I don't wanna tell it that many times."
What did the guy with no teeth say to a blind guy... "How many fingers am I holding up?"
If you want a joke, look at yourself in the mirror!
I was always told I’m too small to ride, but every girl I’ve been with rated me a 9.5.
A bus is a vehicle that runs twice as fast when you are after it as when you are in it.
Do you know Helen Keller?
Yes.
Did you know she had a dog?...... Neither did she!
How did the blind girl get a date?
She said it was love at first sight.
Lesbians and blind women wear the same clothes.
A horse says to the other horse, "Are you hot?"
The other horse says, "Ahhhh, a house that talks!"
What did the blind man fight in the bar?
The coat rack.
One day, in the Serengeti, a zebra started wondering if he was a white horse with black stripes, or a black horse with white stripes. So he goes around asking all the animals. He never gets his answer.
One fateful day, he dies and goes to Heaven. In Heaven, the zebra gets an idea. "I will go ask God!" So, he asks God, and God chuckles. "You are what you are!"
The zebra gets sad. He walks around and his dead zebra friend shows up. He asks, "What is wrong?" The zebra answers, "Well, I asked God if I was either a white horse with black stripes, or a black horse with white stripes. He just replied 'You are what you are!'"
His friend says, "Oh! You are a white horse with black stripes! Why? Because he would have said 'You is what you is!'"