How do you know when you have been invited to a gay barbecue?
When you are unable to distinguish foot-long hot dogs from long and thick big dicks, regardless of skin color.
Why are cops worried about drunk drivers and not elderly drivers?
I just found out I'm colorblind. News came out of the purple.
How do you know a woman is blind?
Because she can’t see the kitchen or the laundry.
Tell a woman she’s beautiful a hundred times, and she won’t believe you.
Tell a woman she’s fat once, and she will remember it for the rest of her life.
The first thing a man looks at in a woman, is her heart.
The fact that her breasts block the view is not her fault.
I used to have confidence issues because of my learning disability.
Until someone told me I put the sexy in dyslexia.
What did the elephant say to the naked man?
"How do you breathe through something so small?"
How many LGBT supporters does it take to change a lightbulb?
The lightbulb is fine the way it is. Society just needs to change the way it looks at it.
How can you tell Donald Trump is old and demented?
He can't distinguish between tanned people and cockroaches!
What is the worst thing about dating a blind woman?
Getting her husband's voice just right.
A man and woman were having sex. After they were done, the man asks the woman, "Are you a nurse?" The woman answers, "Yes. How did you know?" The man replies, "Because you took care of me so well." Then the woman asks the man, "Are you an anesthesiologist?" He says proudly, "Yes. How do you know?" The woman answers, "Because I didn't feel a thing."